Cigarettesandmagic• Show poetry

"humanity does not ask us to be happy. it merely asks us to be brilliant on its behalf. survival first, then happiness as we can manage it." - mazer rackham in ender's game

sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken... - Tyler Durden, Fight Club

i am nicole. or coley or niknik or colcol or niki[NOT NIKKI/NICKY/NICKI].
i'm not shy, i can just be a bit introverted.
there's a difference.
i am made of cigarettes and magic.
i smoke classier cigarettes than you.
my tes smokes more manly cigarettes than you.
i am obsessed with alice in wonderland. and i have been for years. not because it seems to be popular now.
i listen to one song over and over for hours and hours. and i must have a lot of time to myself or i will go crazy.

sometimes people think that i'm unintelligent because of being silly. go ahead... underestimate me, beetches. i probably graduated with higher honors than you and/or have more common sense.

i like doing organic chem for fun. (guess what, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.) cooking is awesome. it's kinda like chemistry with food. though i don't really like breaFKast food. [yeah, i switched it. they're just words. they don't define us. not anymore.]
i'm totally radical and liberal. and i'm a christian. go figure. jesus was a radical, too.
i didn't always believe that way though, i was wiccan for a long time.
it wasn't just a phase.

i'm not thin-skinned. my mom took care of that.

i don't like to keep grudges. it's like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

i'm also just a touch egotistical. i'm sorry for that, but i'm not too sure how to fix it. i try not to let that show too much. my parents instilled in me an overactive sense of self-confidence. i think that i am impenetrable and a super hero. and i act like it. you can tell that because i take on way too much responsibility on myself. it takes its toll on me.

i have had some of the most amazing friends in the world. tes, rodney, amberly, leah, and brandon are what get me through my life. suzanne makes my world go 'round.

when i graduate from college, i will have a BS in psychology and an AS in nursing. then i want to go back for my masters in psychology.

i'm a ninja. i have a kitana [really.] and i'll use it for brain surgery. you won't even know what hit you.
i'm also a gunslinger.
i love lowercase letters.
ender+me=happiness.
green is my favorite. i am a green eyed monster. just like tes.
i miss my momo stronger than any feeling that i feel. i am surrounded with wily reminders of her.
no drugs for me. except for my tobacco.
♥ poetry.
me=[deepness+silliness]shaken, not stirred.

i love the fact that i'm an emotional being. that means that i'm alive. i love the fact that i pick up on and empathize with other people's emotions. that means i'm perceptive and i'm human.

i enjoy people who have a reverence for the random. like the number 5984.

i'm an rpg gamer. old school kind, yo. d20's are great. i guess i like video game rpgs, too.

i love cult movies and any other cinematic adventure worth substance. i am seduced by the idea of vampires. and i despise the concept of lycanthropes. err to the lycanthropes and whoever first mentioned them.

my goal in life is to experience everything that i possibly can in the short time that i have while maintaining my integrity, my loyalty, and my tenderness. i want to love and be loved, but i will be honest. i do not spare feelings, there is no growth if you do. i want to take care of the world. i want to be the best friend to whoever needs it. i want to make anyone with whom i come in contact as comfortable in their own skin as humanly possible. even at the expense of myself.

i am an infj meyers-briggs type. i'm rare. and you're probably not. probably.

'i do not ask for more than just enough dreams to live on' and 'all that isn't singing is mere talking'

i love pablo neruda, sylvia plath, lawrence ferlinghetti, and eecummings. ..

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