Firechilde• Show poetry

Without a God - HOCICO

Answers coming from answers
questions swirling around
they light the fire of cruelty
to glorify their own debility

They walk on wastelands
where steps are erased
there's no trace to leave behind
they just know there's no way to find

Blasts blow from above
beating their heads with force
deafening horror screams
deadly, fatal, touches of wind

Days in disgrace
in search of someone to blame
no one's guilty, no one`s gone
they know they`re nothing without a god

the mute are talking now
they scream, god's gonna forgive their sins.

And nothing will ever change
**************************************************
~~~~~~~~~Alone~~~~~~~~~~
childhood's hour I have not been
As others were — I have not seen
As others saw — I could not bring
My passions from a common spring —
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow — I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone —
And all I lov'd — I lov'd alone —
Then — in my childhood — in the dawn
Of a most stormy life — was drawn
From ev'ry depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still —
From the torrent, or the fountain —
From the red cliff of the mountain —
From the sun that 'round me roll'd
In its autumn tint of gold —
From the lightning in the sky
As it pass'd me flying by —
From the thunder, and the storm —
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view —
E. A. Poe






This poem is a perfect description of how i have always felt in life.Alone and different.Always seeking my pleasures alone.Seeing beauty in things most would overlook.My best friends growing up were books. I write of my sorrows....and the things i see in society today.Many of the ugly things nobody wants to notice..i like to bring it out in blaring detail.Give it the life it deserves but never gets from the passersby to engrossed in material shiny things.I write mainly to let my feelings out.

My current stance on the war is that i support the troops.I also support the so far media invisible veterans from this *war*.They deserve better treatment than what they have received so far.People should be ashamed of the conditions of the veteran benefits system.Yes i am a Liberal.It isn't a dirty work no matter how hard the damn republicans try and make it so.The truth will out! You can ignore it and hope it will go away,you cannot hide it,lies can only carry for so long and then they die.

IT IS EASIER TO TELL THE TRUTH,YOU DON'T HAVE TO REMEMBER ANYTHING!


I am also a disabled veteran from the United States Air Force.I am pagan and happy to be allowed the freedom to worship as i see fit.I also vote.I do not sit on my ass and expect things to happen.I suggest you do the same.





The following are things i enjoy.


Books I Enjoy racula,Exquisite Corpse,The Laughing Corpse.Bloody Bones,Burnt Offerings,Narcissus in Chains,Anything by LAURELL K HAMILTON,Circus of the Damned,Killing Dance,Obsidian Butterfly,Fiend,Memoirs of a Geisha,The pillars of the earth,clan of the cave bear, the valley of horses,the mammoth hunters, the plains of passage,the shelters of stone,the stand,tommyknockers,IT,Silver wolf,twelfth night,lucifer rising,the complete books of azrael,pagan heat,pagan europe,Geisha, a dozen black roses, rosemary's baby,son of rosemary,brain droppings,napalm and silly putty,life during mideeval times,darkside zodiac, victorian women,piercing the darkness,the elemental encyclopedia of 5000 spells,long hard road out of hell, natures end,the return,luciferian witchcraft,sexy origins and intimate things,sexual culture in ancient greece,aphrodite a memoir of the sences,and the harry potter series which i read before i saw the movies.

Movies I Enjoy:Better than chocolate,Finding Nemo,The Exorcism of Emily Rose,Hellraiser,Subspecies,Chocolat,Mansfield Park,Kill Bill,Donnie Darko,Detroit Rock City,Dracula,The Salton Sea,Kiss Me Guido,Exorcist,Underworld,Ginger Snaps,From Hell,Office Space,Quills,Harry Potter Series,SLC Punk,Lord of the Rings

Music I Love!: 666, 4 strings, ATB, Angels of Venice, Apoptygma Berzerk, Atral Projection, Anything 80's , A Perfect Circle, Advent Sleep, Andain, Assemblage 23, Attrition, Azam Ali,Big Left (La Coka Nostra),Bedrock,Bile, Black Tape For A Blue Girl, Bloodhound Gang,Birthday Massacre, Bedrock, BT, Claire Voyant, Chicane,Clannad, Claude Challe, Coal Chamber,Claire Voyant Crisis, Cruciform Injection, Cruxshadows, Collide, Chicane, Cradle of Filth, Darude, Deftones, Deep Forest, Diary of Dreams, Diva Destruction, DJ Dado, DJ Encore, DJ Sammy, Doors, Depeche Mode, Delerium, Dead or Alive, DJ Mystic, Dead Can Dance, DJ Sammy, DJ Tiesto, Enigma, Enya, Erasure, Faithless, Front Line Assembly, Frost, Fear Factory, Ferry Corsten,Fort Minor,Fly Leaf, Gary Numan, Genitorturers, Gorillaz, Gossamer, GiGi D'Agostino, HIM, Hocico, Hungry Lucy, Infected Mushroom, Ian Van Dahl, Informatik, Ivoux, Iio, In Flames, Jacob and Mendez, Kai Tracid, Korn, Kid Rock, Killswitch Engage, Kosheen, La Bouche, Lasgo, Loreena McKennitt, Love Spirals Downward, Lycia, Lazard, Laava, Lacuna Coil, Massive Attack, Machine in the Garden, Magenta, Manikin, Mara, Maria Nayler, Massiv in Mensch, Memnon featuring Seroya, Mike Oldfield, The mission UK, Moby, Mono Chrome, The Moors, Mors Syphilitica, Marilyn Manson, Necromantik Sunshine, Neuroticfish, Nimpf, Nine Inch Nails, Niyyaz, Noctule Sorix, Noemi, Nosferatu, Orb, Orbital, Orifice, Orchestra Dell' Accademia Della Magnificato, Out of Grace, Otep, Ohgr, Pantera, Paralysed Age, Paul Van Dyk, Penis Fly Trap, Perpetuous Dreamer, Pigface, Pink Floyd, Planet Perfecto, Plummet, Pob and Taylor, Portishead, PPK, Prodigy, Punto Omega, Purr Machine, Razed in Black, Rob Zombie, Robert Miles, Rosetta Stone, Roxette, Sandra Collins, Sash!, Sauce of the Future, Second Skin, Seize, Shroud, Slacker, System Of a Down, Snoop Doggy Dogg, Soul Whirling Somewhere, Sunday Munich, Switchblade Symphony, Slipknot, Skin Lab, Sasha and Digweed, Seraphim Shock, Tapping the Vein, Tool, THC, Tapping The Vein, Tekara, Terra Skye, Testube, This Vale of Tears, The DoorsThoushaltnot, Thrice, TNV, Tori Amos, TOW, Trance to the Sun, Twisted Sister, Tunnel Trance Force, Tears for Fears, Rob Evans, Unit 187, The Unquiet Void, The Used, Uva Ursi, Vas, Velvet Acid Christ, Vidna Obmana, Voltaire, Voodou, Voyager, Vast, Zeromancer.

Favorite Foods: My two favorite snacks are gala apples cut up,slices of cheddar cheese,some rustic bread and butter,tomatoes with salt,fresh bell pepper,garlic and im telling you that is heavan for me.with a glass of wine or water or whatever....peaches,sprite when it is frozen so it is like a 7-11 slushy,limeade,wheetabix,potatoes in just about any form,orange juice,chocolate,chex mix turtle mix,fresh organic milk and eggs,bacon once in a while,buscuits and gravy about twice a year,egg sandwiches,macaroni and cheese,bananas,mangos,cucumber,squash,zucchini,eggplant,olive oil to cook with,mushrooms,broccoli,clementines,sometimes just a loaf of hot french bread when your waiting for the bus is heavan.

The SIX Things I Could Never Do Without

The ability to shower,socks,cell phone,internet,my medications, My wonderful Boyfriend Jason,my kitties(LILITH,LUCIFER AND AMUN-RA) and my friends.I know it is more than 6...sorry oh and airconditioning,water

I Think About

Sadness,deep thoughts,art,why people for the most part, are such idiots,how can i make my friends days better,my back pain,wishing that my back would let me do what i want which is clean this house,my cats,my boyfriend,my friends and wondering if they are ok.

Someone asked me this:so i answered them Whats your philosophy on life? Allow everyone the freedom to express themselves in any way they want.Whatever religion you happen to be,enjoy it,but dont preach to me that i should change,i want people to STOP being scared of what they dont understand and then do nothing to find out more about it.Read more books,experience things you dont normally do,just to do it.Understand that life is short and once you realize this you may learn to treasure the little moments in life more.Help people that want to help themselves.Listen to music that inspires you....that makes you feel good.That expresses a deep emotion.Dance,be free just for a couple of minutes a day if that is all the time you have.Love something....a plant,a cat, a dog, a person,but love something.Please know that deep down in my heart,even though you dont know me and i may not know you in real life,i love you.Know this and spread love around.Give random hugs,send cute messages to friends.Give or yourself more.


Also Anyone who owns a pet, or is thinking about getting a pet should read this.

When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad", you'd shake your finger at me and ask "how could you?" But then you'd relent, and roll me over for a belly rub. My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be anymore perfect. We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs," you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.

Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love. She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy. Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love". As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch-- because your touch was now so infrequent--and I would have defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway. There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf.

Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family. I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understood the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers." You had to prise your son's fingers loose from my collar as he screamed "No Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life. You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked "How could you?"

They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you, that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream...or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me. When I realised I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate. I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a seperate room. A blissfully quiet room. she placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood. She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured "How could you?" Perhaps because she understood my dogspeak, she said "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained that it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself -- a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place. And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her.

It was you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of. I will think of you and wait for you forever.

May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.

THE END.

----------

If you are thinking of moving to a new place that doesn't allow pets, you can't move move there. You have made a promise to the animal that you have bought, to take care of it for the rest of its days. My ex-wife decided that our ferret was worth $75, should something go wrong with it. She is my ex-wife. I recently spent $2,500 on my ferret to have a tumour removed from her adrenal gland, and I would do it again. Love is the only thing that makes this life worth living. Money is just not that important.

If your fiance is allergic to your pet, get a new fiance.

If you have had your dog put down because it bit your child, you did not raise your dog properly. Have yourself and your progeny euthanized too, and do the human race a favor.




During an average evening I Am:

At home curled up with a book or a cat and a book or a movie.Asleep, or making a collage,or writing a letter to a freind.



Who I'd like to meet:

I would like to meet,another bibliophile,,someone that likes to wash themselves and smells good(PEOPLE THAT LIKE THESE KINDS OF THINGS OR KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT)insence,wind chimes,CATS,strawberry lip gloss,crazy aarons thinking putty (www.puttyworld.com),black and more (black clothing,black walls,black mirrors),decorating your house like some weird haloween nightmare year round, skulls,fresh vanilla bath ad body works,cold houses, why have a heater in texas and or a fireplace and people that agree with me,no pouting or whining,no fucking drama!, cold apple juice,strange stuffed animals (like my green and yellow fuzzy caterpillar,or my orange duck)plants and ferns,painted toenails,having sex while on pretty fuzzy white stuff,water,silver jewelry,strange eclectic stuff,indian fashion and large fluffy pillows,silk and furry material...,herb gardens,zilker botanical garden,millions of soft socks,vicoden,a diary full of thoughts,holding someone close and smelling their hair, massages naked from me,getting a letter in the mail from a friend, collages from victorian magazine (which doesnt exist anymore),hoping my dad gets better, french bread and cheese and vegetables and olive oil with herbs,fresh tomatoes off of the vine after being warmed by the sun, a sunset in west texas in the middle of nowhere, new mexico supermarkets where you could buy vodka with your groceries,a smile from a loved one,keeping someone safe, when i get a good customer on the phone,someone that plays with candy and understands that one can do this without being a bad person or an addict or some low life that hurts society.