The summer is fast coming to an end
Smart children trample off to school to learn
Autumn’s dry paint will soon descend
In homes oak wood will soon begin to burn
The pleasing scent will reach my heart and soul
When warm to cold the wind shall start to turn
In brisk cool breeze shall I go for a stroll
To smell the air of lightly painted leaves
To watch the dance of crimson colors roll
The gift of life and peace my soul receives
When I will breathe in creation’s cool autumn
Such wonder and awe my joyful heart perceives
Author notes
An attempt at a terza rima and a nature poem. I'm trying to stretch myself.
Terza Rima is a poetic rhyme scheme which involve interlocking rhymes, written in iambic tercets. The rhyme scheme is aba bcb cdc ded etc.. The poem can be any length. Although no specific line length is required, most terza rima poems in English are written in iambic pentameter. If other line lengths are used, such as tetrameter, all lines must be in that length.
Written September 28th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Sweet Structure by jervoodoo.
300 points, ended October 20, 2005, 4 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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While I am not an expert on this form, I must say the iambic pentameter is not on par, and I will start with line one:
"The summer is fast coming to an end"
This line would be seen as weak, as the fourth syllable "is" is not stressed, the fifth,"fast" is, while "coming to an end," leaves about three syllables in a row that are not stressed. I like the message, but many lines are weak in meter...sorry but this is how I read it...Annexoxo
Edited on Sep 28, 5:02 p.m. because ''. -
not familiar with the form itself, but this was a very good poem. you evoked many of the five senses for sure with this one...i could smell the home fires burning, touch the dried paint, see the leaves turn, etc. very good poem and I'm glad I had the chance to read it!
Jo -
You have taken me on a peaceful walk on a crisp autumns day. Bery nicely done. The form is awesome as well. Best wishes in the contest.
Sam
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from what I know of Terza Rima (which is very little...although later this year, we get to write some in the style of Dante for the Inferno :-D) this is terrifically accurate. Also, as far as content goes, it is terrific...brings in perfectly the spirit of fall. Terrific write!
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Not familiar with the form itself, but was following your lines and rhymes and it was pleasurable to read this one.
Great nature offering!
Remarks................................John-Las Vegas
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