I made a mistake --
I got involved,
One look from him
And my heart dissolved,
The heart is treacherous --
It's killing me now,
And I'm looking for a way
To survive somehow,
Either way I'm sure to die,
Wondering how
To say good-bye,
I need him now
He is my heart,
And I could never
Dare to part,
But now the world is going to end,
And I must leave behind
My greatest friend,
With a final breath
And one last sigh,
I gaze once more
Into his soulful eyes,
And with a tearful kiss
I bid him good-bye,
He who showed me
What it was to fly.
Addio il mio amore,
Fino a che non veniamo
A contatto di ancora --
Addio.
Author notes
I was feeling low when I wrote this, but I guess that was a blessing in disguise, because this is one of my better pieces.
Written March 10th, 2006
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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thanks for the comment! the translation to the italian is this... or at least it's along these lines... it's been a little while, ya know? lol.
anyway it says: "farewell my love. until we meet again, farewell."
hope that hit the spot.
- nadia -
Bravo!
?I enjoyed this piece a lot, even the iltalian, i acan guess at a few words that look similar to spanish. A translation of the italian in the comment author's comment box would hit the spot! -
thanks. yeah, sometimes i just go through low points and get all poetic.
it is hard, but you're right, you just have to hold on. thanks for the lovely comment! -
goooddd stuff...
hmmm, often emotion and great painfull times in our lives, or times of great love bring about the best peices, well thats just me and all, what do I know ha ha... but you did a good job here, you were open and you poured somethind deep and special into this piece, giving that extra umph, making it worth more than any price or priceless diddy, great job. I am o so sorry that the pain of the heart is something that plaugues us all, I have known my fair shair of painfull goodbyes, as everyone does, just all I can say is that you shouldn't give up, life is lovely in the arms of another, and you don't have to settle for the joy of one love, unless of course it is the right one...keep your eyes open enjoy life and the love it offers in its many diffrent ways, these things don't hurt as much and are often very enjoyable, such things as the love of art, philosophy and beauty, the things in life that seem to make everything special...all well, enough jibber jabber and stuffy stuff, this was an excelent piece and well deserving of an applaud, so adu to you and keep up the good work. -
i love this, i can totally relate right now...
this is what i feel i need to tell someone right now but i can't...
i love your wording and the form...
i loved it! -
Sad and touching
Omg This poem brings bake so many memories. This poem is probably not about this but it reminds me of my brother of the day he came home from the hospital. My love for that special baby. then he was killed at the tender age of 16 on nov 27, 2005. It brought tears to my eyes. very touching and sad poem I give it two thumbs up.
keep up the good work.
-Kimberly -
i likes it. lots. yeah. i kinda know how the poem-person (you, maybe?) feel... the second language at the end is lovely.
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I don't care for rhyme generally because it makes darker subjects seem light-hearted. I think this might work better if the non-English part was used at the beginning. It's an abrupt end because the reader is looking for the next rhyme. With use of a second language (even though it appears to rhyme)at the end, it pulls the reader out of his/her frame of mind. Something different might make a good beginning if you stick w. a second language.
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awesome
I'm speechless. So strong..so full of emotions,it targeted my own heart.You truely wrote an awesome peom.(i'm sorry I can't say more but i'm just as I said)
darkangel
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i really like this. it sounds like there is a real true story behind this and that you put true feelings in. good job.
- kelsey -
I loved this. Except that i Can't read the ending. I Loved the Rhyming! I thought it still flowed really well. This was a GREAT poem. I have a hard time finding a truly great love poem and this was it!!
Much Love
Faith Trust and Pixie Dust -
Love the Italian at the end.
I think this would work better if you didn't rhyme, but if you must, count syllables and make it more rhythmic. The words are good, don't ruin it by forcing rhyme. I tell all my students the same thing. Pretty good though!!
Elizabeth
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