Just the two of us
Beneath the setting sun,
Staring aimlessly at the seducing sky,
Counting stars, in our talk,
Destined nowhere - an endless walk,
Just the two of us,
Beneath the setting sun.
Author notes
Jadugar
Written April 18th, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- 5 lines of Magic by Sukrit Raman.
300 points, ended July 21, 2006, 2 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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lovely
Great poem, I think only two lines rhymed but then again thats all i see. Good job. Good luck in the contest! -
Good!you get 92/100 +3 if you write jaguar to make it 95/100.
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Awesome
lovely raspberry. Lovely poem that you have here. I love the way that you express yourself here about sweetness between two people. The only way that a man and a woman can express their true love for one another. Keep writing!
Brooklyn -
i really like this. it is simple and effective and really shows emotion. congratulations for winning bronze!
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congrats on winning the bronze for this beautiful and emotion stirring poem. I could not have said anything better than what LionssK has said
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How lovely this is, Archana. The beauty of your words is breathtaking! Hugs, Patricia *hearts;
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Truly a lovely feeling and vivid images all in just eight little lines that says all that needs to be said. I said wow
you never fail to impress me...and leave me in awe. Good luck in the contest dear..
~Kristy
Edited on Apr 18, 11:09 p.m. because 'i'm repeating myself like porky pig
'.
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THANKS FOR YOUR ENCOURAGING AND KIND WORDS, I have read through a few of your pieces, and you are truly talented, I love poetry, and thoughts that you can tell, are heart felt,
its amazing when you can start to write and you feel all the passion, and words just come freely. Blessings now and always!!
:0) -
This is very beautiful, softly romantic, and lovely.
Good luck in the contest!
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beautifully written
wow! this is beautiful it gives you a peaceful feeling when reading it. good luck in the contest.
sneakers -
Thank you raspberry for your most beautifully penned entry into my contest, I must admit, I am very impressed, good luck
Josephine
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