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Don't Know Why

Missing image









The tempests howl incessantly
with your absence,
carving intricate, delicate sorrows  

into the marrow of bones
no longer able
to find sustenance

by holding you near
the surface of skin ~

molding aching hearts
to anguished, moaning ribs

no longer singing
with utter praises,
no longer breathing
your dimensions of delight.

The gray distant clouds recede
beyond the grasp of the horizon,

shedding subtle rain,
flowing unaware & yearning

for your scent
that will not fade
from my gathering fingertips ~

exotically~perfumed fields
of wildflower petals
dance innocently on wilding winds.

You once echoed whispers to me;
the depths of your dreaming eyes
saw me seeing you so clearly...

I could wail ~
no one would listen ~

I fear I'd scatter into
shattered slivers
of mournful crystalline shards

that will never
find form or content
again...

I could sigh ~
what would it matter?

The earth
would never surrender you
to my wanting eyes...

They tell me I should
let you go ~

you have already
been gone too long ~

if I opened
my fiery, fisted hands,

only silken ashes would stir...










Author notes





Picture credit: "Person at the Window" by Salvador Dali





Background courtesy of Danna Hobart





In Memory of DMR, Jr. (1950 ~ 2003)















Written July 4th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 60 of 60

  • marc creamore
    December 1, 2007

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    Ah Swan . . . I am saddened, yet somehow filled with a delicate form of emotional purification when I read this . . . it speaks of your inner self with all its suffering, all its longing, but more importantly, all the love you carry inside you . . . as the snow falls outside my window I sit in quiet reflection and think of past loves and smile inwardly . . . thank you for sharing this oh so private moment with all of us . . . Marc


  • Zayra Yves gold member
    December 1, 2007
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  • kaibab silver member
    December 1, 2007

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    Lovely recalling you ability to penetrate the darker clouds of yellow moonglow and find in dilhouetter, a better glance at ife to feather...great work this one is scribe of irridescent lunar expressions


  • Amaranthine Lover silver member
    August 15, 2007
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    beautiful

    • Night Hope gold member
      August 15, 2007
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      Bet ya didn't know I had it in me to be so dark, did ya, Poet??? Ohhh, yeahhh, I do. I've got years of practice. Thanks, Sweetie.

  • PageTurner
    July 10, 2007

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    From her Heart and Soul...

    absolutely Unbearable... the Sadness, absolutely Admirable and Wonderful, the Love!

    I'm trying to think of something to say to comfort you. We both know there is nothing to say, we handle matters of the heart in our own time, which I'm sure you are doing, better then most.
    Anyways, you've said it, and shared it all (many times)most eloquently. I love you for that, M'Lady.

    I'll close anwering one of your lines:

    "I could wail ~
    no one would listen ~"

    I'd listen!

    My heart goes out to you, Wanda.
    ~ Nicholas ~

  • Nicole Hanna
    July 6, 2007

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    Pretty. Sensual in a very subtle sort of way. "fisted hands" is a great phrase (I'm half tempted to steal it from ya ) The first stanza is also very nice. Many thanks for entering my contest. I could never be disappointed with entries as soft as this one.

  • theredcatjazzoflove gold member
    June 29, 2007

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    molding aching hearts to anguish, moaning ribs no longer singing with utter praises no longer breathing your deminsons of delight this part stole
    me for some reason i had to pause to let you know this was absoulutely beautiful.this is a very giving write you delivered dea

  • AngelicMistress gold member
    June 18, 2007

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    Beautiful...

    Wanda,

    I have enjoyed this piece for it's beauty and because of the comments and responses I read! These made my eyes water by themselves....

    I am so happy to be able to read your works, and appreciate your writings, thank you for sharing with me on this site.....

    Be blessed with love and light always,


    Your friend,
    AngelicMistress...Tanya


  • bethan-gaze gold member
    June 11, 2007
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    This is really well crafted ... a sad, tender poem that resonates long after it's been read. x


  • The Void
    April 13, 2007
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    the entirety of the poem was just beautiful and and it was elegantly written, this line "
    The earth
    would never surrender you
    to my wanting eyes...

    They tell me I should
    let you go ~


    you have already
    been gone too long " was absolutly beautiful. such a wonderful poem you have written hear.

  • Peteskid gold member
    March 21, 2007

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    very touching and poignant

    you have lived this and then you write. The pain is reflected in the writing but must only be a shadow of what you have lived...PK


  • DeepBreath
    February 6, 2007

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    Amazing

    That was so intricately written it was almost one of those poems that at first glance you dont even try to read because it seems too complicated and when you look closer it speaks such a strong story if you open your mind just a little, it was touching, very beautiful, I loved it. I'm sure I will read it again.


  • gullionmar
    February 6, 2007
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    very nice

    written with great emotion and feeling keep up the great writting

  • Aurielle
    February 6, 2007
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    really powerful written so much adjective and metaphors i felt you within

    Keep pennin

  • CarolDesjarlais silver member
    February 1, 2007

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    Oh, you have been gone too long already......gulp...say it is so, that time really does make it eventually fade, even fromthis dull ache.

    "You once echoed whispers to me;
    the depths of your dreaming eyes
    saw me seeing you so clearly... "
    Do you think, we think that perhaps this is our fear? Is there only one to see us that clearly? Is there not another twin soul? Mayhaps it is not an identical triplet, but there simply has to be that similar soul still here.

    • Night Hope gold member
      February 1, 2007
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      I've always said that while Time doesn't heal any pain, it does provide a different perspective eventually...the sorrow recedes somewhat, allowing the joy we'd forgotten to surge forward again...sometimes, we remember things we never thought we knew...Perhaps it is our fear, my Sister...I cannot know...I only know I have to keep trying to keep my promise to Don...I've often speculated on the premise of a "Soulmate"...I think we all have various Soulmates in our lives...not all are meant to be lovers, per se...some are "only" dear Friends...some are not meant to last...yet, all have a profound effect upon our Souls...we are drawn to certain people...they are, in turn, drawn to us...I cannot believe that, like the swan who mates for life, that I would perish from grief & loneliness...I have no intentions of going that way...Not if I can help it, I won't...Yet, I also refuse to "settle" for less than the purest love imagineable...No, it won't be the same as with Don...I'M not the same person anymore...But there is still an infinite amount of love left in these bones, crying out to be given to someone...perhaps one day, the Universe will respond to these quiet wishes...I can only wait...& continue to breathe...Love you, my Sister...

      • CarolDesjarlais silver member
        February 1, 2007
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        I have learned to give up on trying to find that exact thing again for sure...and it is not any less beautiful in different ways. It is a comfort. I have no ideal to live up to..I can be simply me without ever worrying about blowing my cover as less than his perfect ideal of me, as well.

        • Night Hope gold member
          February 1, 2007
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          Like I told Mark...he could no more replace Don than Don could replace HIM...I would never compare one to another...the situation & personalities were so different, as well as the time of my life they arrived...I'm not looking for the grand passion to end all grand passions, really...I never WAS...& comfortable can be so very good...A banked hearth is so much more consoling than the fire that burns so quickly & so brightly & never seems to last...All I really want is to be me, as well...& for them to be who they are, too...so that we may journey together in honesty & understanding...with love on our lips, within our fingers, within our minds, pouring gently through the songs of our Souls...I also told Mark not to put me on any pedestal; I was afraid I'd fall off, crack my head open & all this lovely po'try would leak out... He rather enjoyed that one...

          • CarolDesjarlais silver member
            February 1, 2007
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            LOL, crack me head and all the poetry leak out is one awesome line for a poem sister...lol

  • Nicolette gold member
    February 1, 2007

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    I so love this Dali-painting – have used it with one of my earlier poems too – and it fits the poem so well...the woman looking out the window....wondering where the songs have gone...thoughts filled with “why’s”....the scent that has escaped the fingers (they do say that scent stays the longest in the memory). Such a sad and mournful song of the heart this is; a song of goodbye and loss and you wrote it with such elegance – poignant and tangible and so very moving. I understand it all so well...I myself could have written this. The last few lines really emphasizes the sense of loss here...the depth of despair almost. Such a beautiful and heart-moving poem, Vlindertjie... thank you so much for this entry.

    ~ Nicolette


    • Night Hope gold member
      February 1, 2007
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      I'd say scent & sound both, Nic...When I hear a certain song, it throws me right back where I was again, for so long...You have one on your page; "Angel"...the other was "Hold On", also by Sarah MacLachlan...

      "Oh, God, if you're out there, won't you hear me.
      I know we've never talked before.
      Oh, God. The man I love is leaving ~
      won't you take him when he comes to your door?"

      I never let him hear it...nor let him know I was crying because of it...I know you understand the how & why of it all, my dear Friend...I know you & I both have come such a long way since then, too...I've said it before, Nic...Grief is like the sea; it ebbs & flows...The night I wrote this one, it flowed like never before...& as painful, mournful as it is, it remains one of my own favorites...Thank you for hosting...& for the brilliant depths of your heart, Lady... Vlindertjie

  • ian sawicki
    January 7, 2007

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    a good poem though that other title was running through my mind when i was reading this, you will have to pass me the link to the munchkin one please i am not sure if i have read it before or not. i thank you kindly for entering your poetic piece and good luck to you in this contest - spill ink and twist me into the crazy shape of love...

  • ZombieHooker
    November 22, 2006

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    i like your almost alliteration, using words sounds to mimic the repetition of vowels.

    these lines are my fav

    molding aching hearts

    to anguished, moaning ribs

    now its most likely got alot to do with the fact that being young im a convinced no one ever has the sex after the age of 40, so it strikes me oddly, this magnificent piece, which is so simple but subtly nearly strategically veiled in complexity that you have to realize isnt there.

    which is very unique and rather impressive.


    • Night Hope gold member
      November 22, 2006
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      No sex after 40??? Bite your tongue!!! LMAO Sweetie, my mom & stepdad got married when he was in his 70's...Don't give up hope EVER, Poet... Thanks, my Friend...I'm glad you enjoyed it...I appreciate your thoughtful words...You don't need ME to show you how to leave comments, as you said last night...You're doin' just fine, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    October 17, 2006
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    Your words made me weep, Mark...I want to try; I do...I never wanted to be alone...I've been alone for too many years as it is...We shall see, Gentle Man...

  • mjseattle silver member
    October 17, 2006
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    This poem makes a fire flame up inside me, Wanda. It's over, Darling. It's in the past. As hard as it might be to let go of (I don't know where exactly you are with this now), look to me, take my hand...let's walk together. I swear there's new life for both of us, a new dawning.

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 29, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, June-bug...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...As I replied to my Friend Karen's comment, "I can't just let go of my very Soul, Karen...I know what you mean, my Friend...But you have to understand, Sweetie; Grief ebbs & flows...I'm alright, Lady...but I have to write what's in my Heart, just as you do..." Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 29, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, Noreen...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 29, 2006
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    Sighhh... I can't just let go of my very Soul, Karen...I know what you mean, my Friend...But you have to understand, Sweetie; Grief ebbs & flows...I'm alright, Lady...but I have to write what's in my Heart, just as you do...Thank you for your kindness & concern...but I'm fine... Wander Lea
  • June-bug
    July 23, 2006
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    excellent

    This is absolutely wonderful, This perosn must have been so very special, and sometimes holding on is all we have to keep those special memories alive. I am so sorry for you lose. My peace come to you in time. God bless. wonderful graphics that add so much to the work.

  • Soulful Woman gold member
    July 23, 2006
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    Beautiful Wanda, as always. I have felt this way too many times. You have described it perfectly. Thank you again for filling my soul.

    Soulful Woman
    Noreen

  • transcendental baby gold member
    July 6, 2006
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    Oh hon, you've got to let go ... you know that This is magnificient though ... one of your best

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 6, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, ~Ash~...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 6, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, Assasinated...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • July 5, 2006
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    This is a beautiful piece ... I like it very much ... Well done and good luck in the contest
    Take care...
    ~Ash~

  • Angel Full Of Hurt
    July 5, 2006
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    wow, this is blazing, it's really nicely written, this is just hopelessly beautiful! keep writing.

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Love you, Woman... Vlindertjie

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Indeed, it is, Scribe...Thank you for your beautiful verse, Rich...You hear my Heartsong so well, my Friend... Wanda

  • kaibab silver member
    July 5, 2006
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    Silken ash to wash a fist
    in dust to bring the silence home
    and stir a heart trob thought to die
    for love is always evermore.

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, Mary...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, ermatheelf...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, apertureyes...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, Janet...I'm pleased you enjoyed it, my lovely niece...Be well, Poet...Smoosh, Darling... Auntie

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, nirvanagirl107...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, Salsa...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you for reading & for your kind comments, Donna Sanford...I'm pleased you enjoyed it...Be well, Poet... Wanda

  • gullionmar
    July 5, 2006
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    wow such beautiful emotion full of love and sadness longing for his love once more awsome writing god bless you and live on n be happy ok
  • ermatheelf
    July 5, 2006
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    i really like this a lot ... thnx for the great read

  • July 5, 2006
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    great

    this is such a strong piece of work, i think it's very well written, and the ending is very powerful, yet delicate... very nice

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 5, 2006
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    Thank you, my Friend...
  • Colin OBrien
    July 5, 2006
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    A beautiful sad write...
  • nirvanagirl107
    July 4, 2006
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    so beautiful but sad you definatly have a way with words

  • Nicolette gold member
    July 4, 2006
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    This is an amazing poem, Vlindertjie...one of your best. I know this one comes straight from the heart and the deepest corners of the soul. So beautiful in its sadness, my dear friend. I've used this same painting with my "Eye-memories" poem (think I wrote it for one of Rob's (Pinhead) contests. Your poem and the painting compliment each other perfectly...You wrote this so well. I agree with Rob...don't let him go, but live on. Beautiful, beautiful poetry

    ~ Nicolette

  • Night Hope gold member
    July 4, 2006
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    I know you are, Sweetness...I hear your heartbeat from here, my Friend...I never could let him go completely, Rob...he left too deep of an impression on my Soul...& yes, of course, he'll understand...it was his idea, after all...He wanted me to be happy...& not alone anymore...I love ya, Scribe...You hear me so well... Sweet Pea

  • Just Rob gold member
    July 4, 2006
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    I'm listening.

    Never let him go. If there is another worthy, he will understand.
    Peace and luck.[you hardly need it]

    Zippy

  • Prolific Poetess
    July 4, 2006
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    Three words:

    You are amazing.


    Best wishes to you in this contest!

  • DonnaSanford
    July 4, 2006
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    You create a very stirring picture with your words. Excellent write.
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