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Patience and the NightCrawler



Night crawlers invade her,

personal space becomes the enemy.

it runs like a locked and loaded dark barrelled night.


She has shot herself.

so many times, too many ......... too long is the night.

Patience sits opposite her,

she; twitches on the settee.

snakes and ladders play an ugly

no-win game in her brain, random sixshakes

and still - no

there is never that-  still!


And patience waits-

silver-rubbed hipbone

stainless and a steely gaze.

some think that patience is hard,

short with no give.

no give........... she has given blood over tears,

through sweat she has bonded,

hand over fist.

But - she laid over patience's lap

and a hand rubbed her legs,

till the pain subsided.

the snakes slithered slowly

down the corridor.

out of the emergency door;

where the nightcrawlers dream to escape.


 

in the faded yellowbulbed 4 am prison

they both wondered why women

do what they do?


 

Patience and the night crawler

each alone-

each stuck in the lounge,

on a longnighthome in detox.


Author notes

night shift ramblings...  ......
Written November 10th, 2006

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1 - 14 of 14

  • Nicolette gold member
    November 11, 2006
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    Wonderful poetry, Gill - this poem is so in touch with the realities of substance abuse, the long road, the uphill battle to healing and yes, the inner-turmoil and the hurts of women....the withdrawals of the heart.

    As someone once said: Of all breathing and beautiful things woman is the herb most often bruised. Sad, yet so very powerful poetry...and yes, beautiful in its rawness too.

    Superb writing that lingers in the eyes and the mind.

    ~ Nicolette
    Edited on Nov 11, 4:53 because ''.
  • voices
    November 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    these pages are public but held within are personal corners of you. You bring a reality to this site for us to deal with. the way you present it gives us the chance to absorb it in on a level just our eyes cannot allow. Thank you for sharing your latenight watchtower blues. Best wishes. Darin.

  • Spiritual Nature silver member
    November 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    GREAT POEM!

    You've given me an image of detox and what it's like to beg and plead for the "still" and just watch the snakes keeping their eyes on patience "steely gaze". Surely hell on earth. I've noticed that some of the nicest people I've ever met were addicts. It must be a humbling experience.
    GREAT POEM!

  • Mary Nagy
    November 10, 2006
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    Wow! This was a very powerful read. I look forward to reading more of your work. Sincerely, Mary
  • PalmettoSky
    November 10, 2006
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    With faith as small as the size of a mustard seed, one can move mountains. This is such a beautiful piece of writing.....the words and lines flow perfectly...I must say I really enjoyed this! thank you for sharing this with us and keep up the good work.

  • Annalise
    November 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    damn good


  • Tam gold member
    November 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    I'm stunned...

    OMG...I'm just sitting here staring at the screen...and your words...
    My meager comment can do never do justice this write...I apologize. I AM SIMPLY STUNNED.
    This write is not like reading at all, but, more of an actual physical experience...
    I don't have words...
    AMAZING...JUST AMAZING.
    Blessings! Tammy

  • NoIQ gold member
    November 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Well, when I saw the title's reference to the nightcrawler I was thinking "Hey! Gill's written a piece about lawyers!" After all, bloodsuckers are veritable kin to my profession...

    Seriously, you've captured the hell of addiction and detox perfectly Gill. I see Yvette already has left a supurb comment that I couldn't hope to emulate beyond an obvious "yeah, what she said." However, I do want to note that the atmosphere is perfect - from the twitches and agony of heroin withdrawal, to the colors of the dull yellow lights, to the emotional and physical prison experienced by the heroine of the piece. You identify with why women do what they do, and there is a feminist quality to the piece. However, the torment described is universal, and the question that the reader really is left with at the end is "why do addicts do what they do?", even if the addict is blind to the need to ask that question instead. Supurb poem as always Gill.

  • ca ne fait rien
    November 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    The tension you set up here is amazing, and the reader literally breathes out in relief when the snakes slither away down the corridor.
  • Yvette Champ
    November 10, 2006
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    "in the faded 4am prison women wonder why they do what they do" could be remniscent of women anywhere and everywhere,isn't it women that pick up the pieces whether they live or work with an addict? If they are female they have to dig themselves out of their dilemma and if they are female they dig others out of their dilemma,it's a man's world,he creates the stage,invites the players who don't know they are playing but think it's the real deal.A well written,thought provoking insight into a slice of life that cuts to the marrowbone of existence,working with the addicted out of compassion and necessity is one thing,having one's entire existence fragmented within a loving relationship with another is another thing completely and the double jeopordy is there is a rehab for every adiction except love as I have written about before,women will contine to suffer and then try to heal those that suffer as the direct result of man's delusions,collusions and causing contusions whether emotionally,psychologically or physically.
    The men in rehab are not there because of women,but becauyse of themselves,the majority of male carers are gay,where is the genuine concern from guys per se about anyone or anything else but themselves and their ego?It is as it has always been and always will be,women suffer,women try to heal women and behind it all is inevitably a man.
    A thought provoking write,well written with graphic imagery.

  • -ButterflyCuts-
    November 10, 2006
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    Urgh I have nothing remotely useful or interesting to say. It was really good. sorry xxx

  • Trellis
    November 10, 2006
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    Outstanding and admirable work - your poetry as well as what you do for a living.

    SG

  • masterblaster gold member
    November 10, 2006
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    Hi, good write, I was not too keen on the inversion of, too long is the night but just a fad of mine when used like this, enjoyed this poem a lot, all the best, Di

  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    November 10, 2006
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    Nightshift brings about some of your best poetry.
    I love the way you personified patience. I think I'll
    try to imagine her watching me...patiently next time I
    feel like my patience is shot.
1 - 14 of 14