there were two
on that fateful night
you should have worn a belt
i shouldnt have drank that
if only you didnt trip me
i wouldnt have fallen for you
but you did
so intensely
and you used me
so immensley
i will make you pay
for what you did to me
i'll find you
pin you to the wall
whisper to you
the stench of vodka will be so strong
as you get worried
i slice the blade
across your neck
the blood spills down your chest
and i watch you suffocate
as you hear your last words
from me; "fuck you"
and on that fateful night
there was one left
A contest entry
- Sweet Revenge by cookie crumbs.
300 points, ended December 14, 2006, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Ummm.... Wow? Like.. this isn't real is it?

Scared lolz. Great write, I love the insanity and strength of the piece, however the set up could be a bit better for my likings (meaning Grammer and lines).
Jai. -
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well part of it is and some isnt. obviously the killing bit is what i WANT to do but wont...
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YEY!! BLOOD!!!! XD!

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mwahahahahah
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Reading this I had a picture of this woman I know in my head. Is that bad?
"intensely"
"immensely"
Spelling.
Poem, awesome. Revenge, alright. I understand the feelings. I've wanted to act on mine before... but didn't. Would've loved to though. Great way to show the dark feelings. Good luck xoxo

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im not sure.
i sorted the spelling, thanks.
yeah hehe thanks x
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1 - 6 of 6




