As the evening winter crimson sun settles down
I walk on the wintry lane
Covered with snowflakes, so beautiful and serene
Listening to the cool wind breeze
Playing Christmas melodies
Suddenly I hear a breaking sound
Turned and saw glass pieces flying all around
Crystal clear reflecting my images
As the blood drips around broken edges
I stand all alone, talking to winter winds
Seeking their guidance to lead to the oozing blood
Trickling on the broken crystals
As it led me to the path
Where there was no one else, but me
Chills ran through my spin and hit the ground
Suddenly winds playing Christmas carols
Was now moaning in pale white pain
While storm was building a freezing castle
All around my bleak bleeding senses
The blood is fresh and warm, dripping
Melting into the ground with fallen snowfall
Drip, a drop of liquid on my head
May it’s just melting snow, I said to myself
Then drip, drip, drip again, the snow was red
From my head into my tired eyes
The blood started to flow
Dare I see above my head?
Shaking, rattling like an autumn leaves
I turn my head above in slow motion quickly
I clearly see shoulder length black hair, dangling upside down
Hands were manicured with pale pink nails
It was her stuck on the tree, but who it was I questioned
Suddenly tip toed silence creped in, leaving me dazed
The winds had stopped blowing
Snowflakes were turned icicles
The clock had stopped, the winter evening was stand still
All I see are broken flashing images
Flashing in bits and pieces right before my eyes
A girl walking down the on the wintry lane
All dressed in pale pink, singing and listening to winds playing melodies
Bham! Suddenly, she drops on the ground
Blood oozing slowly on the white grounds
In an expensive boulevard
Dressed in Christmas outfit, sparkling silver, reds and greens
The Santa Claus is up on the roof sliding down
With Rudolf and huge bag of precious gifts
While on the side is the big community Christmas tree
Sparkling with stars and angel on the top guarding
Long Sighs, repeated long sighs, the lady in pink
Turns and tosses her immobile head
While shaking hand on her left slightly upward
Calling, as if reaching for me
Help! Were the last spoken words
Hustle bustle, police sirens
Ambulance, paramedics went right pass me
Straight to her trying their best to revive her
But no more CPR worked, they just gave up
While I stood their witnessing her demise
The radio call suddenly called for help
The cops took that and off they went
Swoosh! The curtains are drawn
The scene is all now blurred
I struggle to remember what had happened
Who was that woman?
But all I got was complete Christmas silence
Scared, I reach for the dangling body
The fingers attached to her hands is freshly frozen veggie
While the body was old stale piece of wood
That was ready to crack at gentle touch
Petrified, I touched her demised body
And, tumbling it cam down at my feet
Shocked I stood there
Not ready to believe
Can’t be, I try run away
But the frozen wind castle around barred me
I bang & try to break, but all in sheer vain
The crystal sheath of silence surrounding me
Let lose my own deafening loud cries
But no one to hear a sound
The shinning reflection of mine
Gently falling on blood stained crystal glass pieces
Reflecting my broken image
Was now laughing at me, mocking me
Puzzled and scared, I asked
God what do you want from me?
In response returned creeping silence
I looked down once again
I feel no more cold winds
No chills running through my twisted spine
No more tears floating in my eyes
My hands are numb
Feet glued to the wintry grounds
While body stands still
I reach and touch her, then gave her a smile
Rest in peace my dear, for it’s time
You are now going to your loved ones
Where you will have no stinging pain
No tears, but endless love
You will be residing now in heaven
Sitting next to the royal throne
The lights sparkled, the gate was now open
To take the buried soul off of the wintry grounds
The hand reached out for her
To take her away from the cruel world forever
Gentle fairy finally asked, are you ready my dear?
We have come to take you to a special place, she tenderly smiled
I’m ready, and waved goodbye
To stalling me, for now I had accepted
I am dead!
Author notes
Just have fun on wintry grounds...Merry Christmas
In a list
A contest entry
- Make Me Cold by Sun Shower.
370 points, ended December 26, 2006, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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yeah this made me feel a bit cold
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Wow this is weird. At fitrsti ti started out with a beautiful winter scene then it turned tragic when the girl was hit to only find out that you were the one hit and a fairy takes you to a nioce place. It is different.
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Very unusual wintery poem - lots about death, even though winter to me is more about cycles coming to an end but continuing on in the next season. Quite the tale you tell here - a story that includes so many wintery things- just a sad ending...
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Wow.
This poem is amazing. I loved it! Great Write! Good Luck! -
Brrh! I am not only cold but I am shocked as well. What a twisty tale you write. It was very good. Thanks for sharing it with me. Take care.
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I'll tell you what, BC, this one kept me reading to see where it would take me. Kind of neat to see a poem that is unexpected in its directions...at first I thought it was a soft and feely (so to spaek) poem, but then it was...wow, where is this going? Nice work and thanks for posting.
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lol
this is not just a little werid it is my kind of werid, you did a great job and i just have to say wao, keep it flowing and a merry christmas to you too -
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Thanks again Prodigy
Thanks hun for stoppig by again and taking time to read my weird poem
. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it. It was weird, it was something I was feeling and it turned up to spooky & weird. hhhmmmmm But I enjoyed writing it too. Thanks for wonderful encouraging comment & appreciate your time. Happy Holidays & Take Care.
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Very Effective.
OMG! I really liked this piece. It was really effective and moving. You should keep this work up, because I know for a fact that I will read the rest of your poems, which are obviously great as this one. Again keep it up! -
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Thank you again Deep-in-thoughts
Thanks again for taking time to read my poems, I really appreciate it. I'm so happy you enjoyed reading it. Thanks again for stopping by to leave such a sweet encouragement in your thoughtful comment. Thanks sweetie
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BRAVO
i loved this title and poem, i think, its fabulous writing. keep it up, bittercandy...
red roses
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Hello My Red Rose!
Thank you so much for stopping by and taking time to read it. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I love the rose, thanks for delivering it to me. Thanks hun, I really appreciate your time and applaud that encourages me a whole lot!
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It is quite good, playing atop the clichés of love. The imagery is decent, but the plotline is what shines. Great story... and great poem.
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Thanks NickBlaze
Thanks Nick for stopping by and taking time to read my poem. I'm glad you find it interesting and it's an honor to get compliment from a great humble novelist. Thanks for stopping by and leaving an encouraging comment with the smiley applaud. Thanks again.
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Brava
Once again Minoo, oh sister of mine, you have captivated me and trasported me into the words that you have written. This poem was amazing. I loved it soooo much. So well written and it flowed nicely. I loved the lines:
" The shinning reflection of mine
Gently falling on blood stained crystal glass pieces
Reflecting my broken image
Was now laughing at me, mocking me
Puzzled and scared, I asked
God what do you want from me?
In response returned creeping silence"
Love you Minoo
~ Mia
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Here's My Sis!
You are just too sweet, I love my family long *sigh* thanks for taking time to read it. I'm glad you enjoyed reading. I was just getting ready to scream, so I cooked up something, atleast on screen hehehehe!
Thanks hun for you smiling applauds & got to luv the rose, 1 of my favorite flowers. Thank you thank you thank you. I now have a sister hehehehe, yes! thanks again
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That's my little girl!
Thanks baby! for reading, I was wondering where are you ? Thanks hun for being my first, vey first most wonderful critique in the whole universe. Take care & have fun on your Birthday without your Mommy
Love you and just have fun. Thanks again for smiling applauds for all I see is your face in them smiling at me. Thanks sweetheart.
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Loved it!
I loved this poem mommy! It was really well written, as always. Keep up the good work! I got to go so take care. My favourite lines in your poem is "
I reach and touch her, then gave her a smile
Rest in peace my dear, for it’s time
You are now going to your loved ones
Where you will have no stinging pain
No tears, but endless love
You will be residing now in heaven
Sitting next to the royal throne" Goood job mommy. Bibi!
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