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The Sayer, The Knower and The Doer.

I met a man who loved to dance with words;
he followed their rhythm and step
day and night until he became a fool.
He sat me down in his kitchen
on a worn-out diner's chair,
he put both my hands on my knees
and eyed my questioning limbs.

He began to laugh with a pompous tone.
I could see his thoughts riveting,
streaming,
planting their way to the ceiling from his mouth.
He cried about the children of Universe
and something about how names didn't matter,
he tried  to inspire me
with no result,
for at the time the spark in my eyes
had fallen dull.

I wish today I had only explained to him
how the power he possessed was an illusion,
that cause doesn't bread with the effect
and the effect didn't spawn the reaction,

all three are of continuous existance,
peeking out behind their hiding
when a friend calls upon them.

The only thing I need
are my own to feet
and I don't need to worry about Universe's kids
because myself,
I've grown a child,
and I called him Solution.
So forget about the minutes passed
an learn how the things you can change
are really the only ones worth keeping in mind.

I used to be beaten down by every situation
just to see
that things affect us most
when we let them beat our ashen minds.
Situations don't mind kicking hard
even when we're already on the ground.
Now just forget about yesterday
and what tomorow could bring;
stare conflict straight into the eye
before you have him staring back at misery
and shift the laws of Universe
before all you’ve built
truly does come down.

Then;

I promise you will stand proud
and leave behind the one's
who've stumbled upon their words
and died with
rotten
beauteous
thoughts hanging out their mouths,
leave behind the one's
who were filled with the highest knowledge
but fell with the stupid
then just didn't know anymore
and then join all the one's
who were called upon as weak
and ran through the obstacles
and acted,
acted
acted
and made a clear defintion between
the sayer
the knower
and the doer.

Author notes

Wrote this after reading Ralph Waldo Emerson's essay Keep it simple, life is what you make of it.

Please tell me what you think withough bullshittin me

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • Zayra Yves gold member
    April 11, 2007
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    .


  • onerios13
    January 13, 2007

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    I promise you will stand proud
    and leave behind the one's
    who've stumbled upon their words
    and died with
    rotten
    beauteous
    thoughts hanging out their mouths

    Very powerful piece, my gurl...and although it is not your usual abstract and deeply convoluted stylings, it nevertheless conveyed your inner strength and an energy that is both unusual and beautiful to behold. Now, normally, I am a fan of the 'purdy poetry' that you seem to throw out like necklaces at Mardi Gras, but this is not that. This is something more important. And it shines like the northern lights...


    • vaseline
      January 14, 2007
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      The only thing I'm throwing out like mardi gras now is energy, and I poured energy in this piece. I really like it, so the responses I've gotten dont really matter. I've learn to live up to MY expectations, no one elses.

  • BlackWidow43 silver member
    January 6, 2007

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    hmmm... there's something about it that doesn't seem like the you i was used to.... you used to be more straightforward in your writings and this one seemed more wordy than your usual blunter style.

    it's not bad.... but it didn't tickle my pickle like the ones that made you one of my top favorites.

    i hope i didn't offend you, Jane.

    I've missed you... I hope you and Jinnie are well... you seem to have disappeared together.

    • vaseline
      January 14, 2007

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      nothing offends me, i dont really care what people think about ym writing anymore. i do it for me, as a means of expression. Jinnie and I have been good, still fighting a constant battle against life, but I know we'll win.


  • JustBe gold member
    January 6, 2007

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    No bullshit

    In terms of poetics, I agree with Diana. Ah, but there is poetry, and then there is personal exploration. To me this is more impressive for its courage. The stuff you wrote when your situation was "kicking you hard" was incredibly powerful, but it was also etched with a sort of hopeless resignation that is 100% absent here.

    This has such a completely different flavor, it would never even occur to me that it was written by the same poet. Since it wasn't, that's as it should be. I said it about your last post, and I'll say it about this one, too: There's more of something here, and I think it must be Jane.

    I already know you're a master wordsmith. Please forgive my presumption: I get this image in my head of someone who has spent a long time writing brilliant descriptions of how it feels to be kicked repeatedly while lying face-down in the same pile of dirt. Now she's brushing herself off a bit, taking a deep breath, and making a conscious choice about where she would prefer to go. Your penchant for holy-shit imagery is alive and well here, but that's not what I like best about it.

    This is more awkward than your older stuff, but only because there's more to it, and it's every bit as intelligent. In addition to "what," "when," and "where," here you've also decided to confront "why" and "how" head-on. No resignation there, and when those questions were up to you, your first thought was to pick Ralph Waldo Emerson's brain for ideas. When you're about to turn a page in your life, my guess is it's never a bad bet to find one with RWE's name written on it. For crying out loud, here was a man who was saddled with not just "Ralph," but "Waldo" to boot, and he is still a household name 170 years after he first hit the scene.

    No idea where you'll decide to go next, but I am really excited to see what you'll start cranking out once you get good and comfortable with the FACT that all along, what was so powerful about those exquisite words you've been writing--irrespective of impetus--was the person who wrote them. You were sayer, knower, and doer all at once, so it's really not debatable.

    I'm having a bit of a stroll myself of late, but I will definitely make a point of allowing myself the pleasure of coming back here to read what you have to say.

    Keep it up,
    Morgan


    • vaseline
      January 14, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Cheers.

      Thank you very much Morgan, I like it when people take the time to dig into what I write. I've been feeling inspired by life lately. Its been hard, but good at the same time. I have no time anymore to cry about the What happened has happened, fuck it. I cant change the past, and I have better things to do than complain about the life I've never had.

  • ZorroTheFox silver member
    January 4, 2007

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    another nice write. it's good to see your pen is back. keep up the great work. Now I think I need some dinner

  • Melissa Gayle gold member
    January 4, 2007

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    This is another amazing piece. It is personal and full of emotion and image, each line accentuates the next and before I want it to be, it is over.
  • BigFaja
    January 4, 2007
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    outstanding

    You continue to blow me away.


  • transcendental baby gold member
    January 3, 2007

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    This is a great call to personal reflection and action ... one worthy of the self-reliant ... but beauteous words often "are" a battle call for action ... as was the case with Emerson. His lectures and essays were the foundation of liberalism and abolition .. and he had the balls to tell his divinity school that Jesus was not God ... and his amazing descriptions and metaphors of the transparent eyeball and the web of connectiveness in everything is a burning light to some of us Idealist You've spoken true here and with an Emersonian spirit that inspires ... thank you for the reminder


  • Dienush Greeters member
    January 3, 2007

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    This poem is very interesting and uplifting. I like it how you can say things so nicely and make up such a vivid atmosphere without being too preachy (though I think you have in the end a little). I liked the first three stanzas more than the rest. I think they were very powerful and your poem could have done without the rest, but it's just as good with it.

    "how the power he possessed was an illusion,
    that cause doesn't bread with the effect
    and the effect didn't spawn the reaction,
    all three are of continuous existance,"
    This is a good example of what I mean by teaching through poetry without being too preachy. I appreciate people who can do that well.

    The title is also very good. Now I think of it better, the last few lines are very important to the meaning of the poem.

    Anyway, to put it simply I love this poem.

    ~Diana

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