She fell to the floor
Legs bent, Arms limp,
Face pale,
Tainted from the needle,
That sticks out of her arm.
Her fingers twitch,
And Dreams fade,
Razorblade cuts drip
Crimson imperfection.
As Warm tears flow
Down her sad porcelain face
Her blood shot eyes are
Glazed and lost in a
Violent depression.
Nails deep in her own skull,
Rapidly tearing out chucks of
Her spun golden hair.
Cigarette smoke dances,
Through the rooms.
Her apartment floor,
Is littered with ashes
Countless Needles,
Bloody blades,
And a neatly folded
Good bye note.
And here lies the grave of
This Cut-Up Angel
Who could never tell the difference,
Between what was real,
And what was a lie.
Author notes
Its kinda just hit me, so I wrote it
I was thinking and said the title, and then it just kinda wrote itself. hope everyone enjoys it!
Its a Cross of the Little Angel on the grave,
and the gril staring out the inner city window
It Just kind of fits both to me.
opition 3
A contest entry
- Darkness Does Fall... by bittertears.
600 points, ended January 29, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - MORE PICK FROM PIX by piccola.
450 points, ended January 31, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - deeper than darkest by Jake Jackson.
375 points, ended February 6, 2007, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark Poetry Freaks by princess of death.
360 points, ended February 8, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - DARKNESS (The Anti-Valentine) by Sally the Ragdoll.
525 points, ended February 23, 2007, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - blackrose... by my savior-pedro.
355 points, ended February 15, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give Me Dark, Pain, Hell, Sorow, Tears, Sad, Creepy, Scary, Vampires, And Bloodly Poetry by Xgeekdreamgonewrong.
300 points, ended March 4, 2007, 47 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Darkest by Shiro Okami.
816 points, ended March 1, 2007, 15 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sad Dark Depressing...... by Ntagatf.
400 points, ended February 23, 2007, 103 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - contest by alovedisorder.
500 points, ended February 26, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - show me your talent by Kiss ME Deadly.
300 points, ended March 13, 2007, 45 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark, Dark, and more and more Dark by Eternal Rose.
400 points, ended March 18, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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Good
It was good, i really liked the picture you painted, the title was what drew me into this poem, it seemed so... i dunno what word i'm looking for, but it was enjoyable good luck in the contest
Luv MDH
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A hard hitter! Well done!
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It's very, very good/. And damn is it in a lot of contests!
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GOOD!!!!
SO SO SO GOOD!
GOOD LUCK -
this was a great write and yor words were very strong and pwoerful and descpritve and i enjyyed reading this..your a very tal;ented author keep ritting your great at it
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beautifully written. good luck..
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Nice! Do I sense another fan of The Used, by any chance?
Either way, this is a great poem.
Keep up the good work, and good luck in my contest!
-Sally -
great job this is right on the money what i wanted
deep dark sad gory with detail
good luck youve made it to the finalist list
-
Cigarette smoke dances,
Through the rooms.
Her apartment floor,
Is littered with ashes
Countless Needles,
Bloody blades,
And a neatly folded
Good bye note.
I'm not sure why but thats my favorite part. i like it alot its rele good -
Loved it. It showed so much pain and emotion and the vivid images that you make with your words are so well written. Great write.
-
wow...this is very intense. the emotion is all just so powerful. i love it. great job.
:-)
:-)
:-) -
Wow
Wow..I fuckin love this.
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good!
wow! very good. I like it. You have a gift for the darker side of poetry. I like the whole story behind this poem. my favorite line was:
Who could never tell the difference,
Between what was real,
And what was a lie.
It has such as sad ending. -
this is very...wow and disturbing at the same time.
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This is a great idea, two pix in one. It's not what I meant but it's a great idea. Reminds me of stolen innocence...the child becoming the sad, young woman. Drugs and all that. Thanks for entering.
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Nicely written. It was pretty. maybe not a good word for this poem. But I liked it! Thanks for entering and good luck!
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This was a very dark poem and quite eerie. But, that is what dark poems are all about now aren't they? They are made to send chills down your spine. Your imagery was awesome and the expression of of emotions helped your tale along. I can actually relate to this place you have described here and the subject you have written about. Not the needles though because they're not my thing.
Now, I have broken my own rule. I never read an entry in a contest that I am planning on entering but I was checking out some of your poetry. I don't like to read the poetry because I don't want anything to seep into my subconscious and accidentally steall someone's idea.
lilangel'snemesis
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