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foot in both

Missing image

Unappealing
unnatural
man machine
;
artificial object,
obedient slave,
as once was
human to human,
now animate to inanimate
the unliving the depraved.

Yet if i unbidden

stop to assist

you undoubtedly

bestow gratitude

for an act of kindness,
a human trate

no circuit search could trace
any more than if i sought to locate

your soul and the exact spot

where it may be encased.

Are we then to conclude

neither possess tenderness

spiritual substance

or essence of human

as these idiosyncracies

remain unmeasurable

uncalibratable, unproven.

 

So In his image we

both are made,

but who of the two

is favored, for you

return dust to dust

but i live, forever fated

to eternal wondering 

[with a foot in both worlds]

why was i created?

Author notes

swanridur
Prompt 'Old Cyborg'

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • gingerhall1976
    October 6

    Edit | Reply

    I really liked this

    I think this is so well written. The imagery is wonderful, the verbiage is outstanding, and it couldn't match up better with the picture if you had created the picture to go with the poem yourself. Well done!


  • Poetdontknowit
    February 18

    Edit | Reply

    NICE JOB!!!!!!!

    Brilliant take on the wierd picture! Your vocabulary is straight out of a Star Trek adventure!lol Of course this one would win some trophies!!!!!!!!!!
    keep on penning
    POETDONTKNOWIT


  • Just Mercedes
    February 18
    Edit | Reply
    Thoughtful and provoking. What is the measure of man? Well done.


  • Perception
    February 17

    Edit | Reply
    Great write... I think you could have spaced it more out.. To make the flow better. But, it's fine just the way it is.

    ~ Wonderful

  • xRAYEx
    February 17
    Edit | Reply
    loved it. :-)


  • Death of the Author
    November 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is, excuse my language, fecking immense.

    The first stanza sets it up brilliantly. I can't really tell you why I like this so much...I just do.

    The second stanza, well that just builds on the first, with a great idea drawing with a great conclusion (of sorts) in the third stanza. The repetition of "un" throughout the poem works very well. Good use of idiosyncrasies as well.

    The 4th stanza is phenomenal. And you make a great case from the syborg's perspective. I love this, I truly genuinely love this. One of the best free verse poems I have read. The whole thing fits so well with the picture.

    Congratulations on the Honourable Mention
    Thanks for entering
    Good luck
    &
    Take care


  • Don Quixotes Quest
    June 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I'm sorry, how is this about hope or inspiration? Either way, I like this poem quite a bit. It's very machanical in a good way. ^_^

    -Dlvvanzor

  • jo-el
    May 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    whoa..loved the musing introduced in 2nd stanza..the way you build these thought processes are very stimulating and provocative.. well put together in accordance with theme...superintelligent and somewhat mechanical...last stanza ends in a question relevant to all that live...you got me tunin up my thinkin cap for this one...i appreciate it...excellent write.


    • swanridur gold member
      May 18, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your comment and applause.........I'm glad you enjoyed it.....and got the meaning of the peace. SR

  • Mr C
    May 7, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Well done!- yes indeed, how can you measure something that has no substance- the human soul, a robot's sentience.
    Nice job- certainly made me stop to think this morning.
    Thanks for the entry and best of luck in the contest.

1 - 14 of 14