He murdered muesli with a grin and sneered while flaking rice,
He slaughtered maize, with cheerful gaze - battered barley in a trice¡!
Bran and grits he shucked with glee, winnowing with contempt,
While with a wicked will he whacked at wheat, until the grain was spent!¡
It’s true to say, in every way - he is the jolly miller…
Still we must face, the true disgrace…he is a cereal killer¡!
Author notes
Does anyone else tire of the disingenuous CSI; where Grissom solves vast enigmatic puzzles with a foppish flick of the wrist¿? If you watch the real thing on Discovery, every small step is a titanic struggle… or protracted search – months and years, not minutes¡!
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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Midsomer in Oxfordshire is the place to be.. if you are an estate agent or undertaker that is.. three murders a week, always summer, garden parties every week, not an ugly bugger in sight and they eat muesli for breakfast!
As always i bow down to your wordery
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Beyond the impeccable metre and word choice that ameliorates both the bounce and feel of the piece, I was struck by the most wonderful euphemism which explained the real reason as to why the miller was so jolly.
While with a wicked will he whacked at wheat, until the grain was spent!¡
I suggest the miller need not feel alone
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_qv7K3nxsk
David
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Ahh once again the silica makes me smile...I had anticipated some trivia about a bacon butty (vegetarians are taking over!) but twas a wonderful cerial killer!! nicely done.....oh whats the time? hmmm time for lewis she thinks..and hopes the gentleman will not shy away from the task.....I have not watched CSI but have seen it advertised.....surely it cannot be worse than "murder she wrote"....not only does she solve a murder in half an hour, she is conveniently within the vicinity when they take place!
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No it probably isn’t that bad!! The Angela Lansbury version ran for twelve series and I think I have only seen one episode… while staying in a motel… The new series I have so far missed completely!
At the start CSI wasn’t too bad, based on real cases and methods, but of course just as Misnomer area (better name for a village) runs out of people, so script writers try for greater and more sensational events – I think the truth is that forensic scientists are probably the most boringly pedantic anal-retentives on the planet! It is a prerequisite of the job! And only double dealing, four flushing, two timing, scum bag writers could make them appear interesting – writers have a LOT to answer for!¡!¡!¡
…Speaking of which… which Lewis Carol did you fancy¿?
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How about "the vanishing" or "the bankers fate" I feel very much in a snarky mood.......how do you feel about Edward Lear?...I am partial to his renditions too...particularly the old man...was it old father ted?....I look forward to your next production sir!
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very good! And to answer your question, I am very tired of CSI et al...A very entertaining read. Well done.
Rory
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Loved It
Ha! This is great!!!! It has been a long long time since I have been by to read your work. It has been a while sinece I have been online. I am so glad I found you again!!!
Anna -
Very Good
It reads somewhat like a psychoanalytical dissection of the cereal killer! lol, kidding. I simply love the rhymes and the unfailing humour. Wish I could write like you....some day!
Congrats!
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You make agriculture sound so... so.... (wait for it) Seedy.
A master of the mix, a weaver of words- it does my heart good to find you're still about. x
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Ah.... but do they do it with such telegraphed wit? I must sadly admit that I actually LIKE Grissom
I think it's more the character than the grain of truth, besides if they created art from life, no one would sit around to watch it would they?...
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Very true – it would be a very slow show… but I think they could make it look a tad more realistic¡! Whizzing clocks and fast forwards lab work – lol.
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Feeling your oats?
Cereal killer is a running joke in our household. I love the way you have taken it to extremes.
NCIS is the sleuth of choice - though I prefer less blood in my entertainment.
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Dang¡! Can’t even pun with originality¡! But I guess it is difficult when such phrases are soooo in your face… perhaps I could pun organically… that might be popular at the moment – or do you already use that one too¿? Healthy free range puns… (((Lol))) (Thanks for reading¡!)
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Cereal killer crops up when we find another dead corn flakes box.
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Ho Ho Ho. I larfed. I like it, it really did make me laugh. Nice one
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