Hiding under the covers
He is not aware
That the shadow that he's scared of
Is the shape of his own fear.
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Very nicely written, and I defiently agree with the last two comments....This left me thinking.....
Thank's for entering my contest and good luck! -
O.O
I must agree with the comment below me, it is very simple yet effective and I can see this is a creepy kids book somewhere. It's sweet in a morbid sort of way and to the point and I like that about this one, I also like the idea of fear and darkness manifesting into physical shapes so great work. It is not exactly rhyme, more of a slant rhyme but in previous comments I accept that because it is a form of rhyme none the less. Thanks for entering and good luck to you in the contest.
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Very simple, but effective. I could see this in a children's book actually. I would not capitalized every line here, would read more fluid.
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Man has always feared their own fear....I guess that is what makes us human
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This ones eerie and makes me think of those times I had to comfort him with his fears... human fears are often irrational and rarely take place, but at the back of the mind the shadows lurk.
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DQ... Because I can;t see in which contest this was placed. Sorry.
Luv,
~Candy
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Short and sweet.
Nice entry. Good luck in the contest!
Write on!
*PEACE*
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Hi. Many thanks. Cheers, jimmy
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great
short and exactly to the point
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Hi. Thanks. I've returned the compliment. Hope you find my comment helpful. Cheers, jimmy
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This is good...very clever. You paint a strong, vivid picture in these few short words. The brilliant part about it is, that no more words are needed. This fear is probably one that all can relate to without exception. Nicely done. Thank you for the entry.
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Thanks. Glad you like it. Good luck with your contest. Cheers, jimmy
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