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The Morning After Many Nights Before

"You ask me if I want to score?
I tell you, man, I'm up to here -

my legs are dead my arse is sore

from kipping on this grotty floor.

As soon as I can find the door

I'm on my way and out of here -

Whose place is this? This dump's a pit!

I'm wanting out, I need to split,

I need to have a bit of space 

I need to be alone a bit.

I've been too long out of my face -

Too many spliffs and too much beer.

Right now my head's all drum-and-bass

I can't see straight, I can't think clear.

Chrissake - if I keep up this pace

I'll be a bloody basket case!

 

I've had a real bad acid trip -

I need to chill, a proper kip,

I need a bath and change of gear.

Include me out - I've had enough

of popping pills and scoring puff.

I'm done with  dossing down on floors -

I'm gonna bin this bloody bag!

My head's a mess, I'm feeling rough -

(Oh man, I'm dying for a fag  -

can I blag me one of yours?)

I've had a bloody awful night

I tell you, man (you got a light?) -

Know what I mean, though? Get my point?

(Shit, man, this here's a wicked joint,

that first drag's give me quite a hit!) 

Now. . . . What was I just saying, man?

. . . . (is there some lager in that can?)

I woke up feeling really shit -

I think I'll just lay here a bit.

This place aint bad. Know whose it is?

Hey -

any chance you got some whizz?"

 

Author notes

Dope

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 26 of 26

  • whiterabbit--x
    October 9

    Edit | Reply
    I really enjoyed reading this. There aren't many humorous poems in this contest. I enjoyed the flow of it and the way that it went from one drug to another. Great write and thanks for entering.

  • Jfd
    October 7

    Edit | Reply
    great style, loved how each line flowed into the next...I was really able to understand the mindset of this piece, you were able to make it coherent but still expressed the cloudiness of being high....nice job!


  • DemonSpit
    October 7

    Edit | Reply
    mf outstanding, I LOVE IT!!!!!
    i can see why you won some kind of trophy in most of the contests this poem was entered in...
    expect yourself to get a trophy in this one too

  • kao3
    September 16
    Edit | Reply
    Right on brother, British eh? Good read and easily transfered to a monoluge. Good entry here.


  • medicalpoet
    September 15
    Edit | Reply
    this was one of the best writen poems, if not the best of this contest. great job!


  • SoftlyScreaming
    June 20

    Edit | Reply
    irony, it gets me every time.. great way to end the day let me tell you.. youve got a knack for imagination, i like this write.. it didnt make me feel creative, but let me hit that and i will, lol.. thanks for entering and good luck to you..


  • Pandorea
    June 12
    Edit | Reply
    interesting...it's got a wonderful flow/rhythm etc.

    thanks for entering.

  • Recluse Writer gold member
    June 11

    Edit | Reply
    Shassidy said it all for me.
    You really have a way with the inclusion of non verbal verbals (if there is such a thing ...just the way I see it when I am not looking )
    Well penned indeed!
    Linda


  • Shassidy
    June 9

    Edit | Reply
    This is a great poem! I like the flow, rhythm, rhyme, and phrases you use in this, it all make the poem very creative. I like the flow a lot because it goes with the poem and the rhyming well and vise versa. My favorite phrase in this poem is "Include me out" because I'm a really big fan of taking clichés and turning them into original ideas, which is what you have done with this line. You did the same thing with your title, which made me very interested in the poem just by reading the title. Also, I like the use of the "()" in this because it works well to convey the lines in the poem and the way they are meant to be said. There are a few parts that need a bit of rewording, like the line "I woke up feeling really shit -", but it's still a great poem. Overall, great job and good luck in the contest!

  • queen Greeters member
    April 18
    Edit | Reply
    Congratulations


  • ea silver member
    April 17

    Edit | Reply
    definitely catching the wave of rhyme as it trips from the tongue in a natural groove here. Thank you very much.


  • unanswered
    April 7
    Edit | Reply
    This is hillarious and kinda sad at the same time. I really enjoyed it.


  • kinfolkn gold member
    April 7
    Edit | Reply
    haha I enjoyed this alot. Thanks for entering and good luck!


  • lilblueeyesmine1978
    March 23
    Edit | Reply
    this is good and funny thanks so much for sharing.

  • nobodys-girl
    March 21

    Edit | Reply
    im a very anti-drug person but i truly love this peom. for some reason it reminds me of a cousin of mine, maybe because he's just like this after he starts tripping. thankyou so much for entering my contest and good luck!

  • CarnalNineTailedFox
    March 12

    Edit | Reply
    this was very powerful! i really like it. great job! thank you for entering and best of luck to you! NineTailedFox

  • EarthToJim
    March 12
    Edit | Reply
    Interesting perspective on how a little wake-me-up hair-of-the-dog can put a whole new fresh perspective on the day and some of the psychedelics, though inherently dangerous, can fill in the gaps of the tri-color maps of the cortex contender for chromatic conduits through time space dimensions of crystalized chaos... and beyonddd....


  • JinSays gold member
    February 18

    Edit | Reply
    My head's a mess, I'm feeling rough -
    Oh man, I'm dying for a fag -
    can I blag me one of yours?
    I've had a bloody awful night
    I tell you, man - you got a light?
    Know what I mean, though? Get my point?
    - Shit, man, this here's a wicked joint -
    that first drag's give me quite a hit -


    Gonna kick tomorrow...a line in a favorite song of mine.
    I'll stop drinking so much beer, tomorrow..
    No, I'm not smokin any more pot, you can pass me..
    and the pills...ugh. They're the worst, only because they're convenient, clean, and universally accepted in most non-third world countries, as something that's alright as long as there's a Dr around...

    This is a very thought provoking piece, and no, I don't see any preaching here. You're not telling me to NOT do these things..and you're nottrying to get me to do them...it's what it is, and yes, let's kick tomorrow..
    Amen.
    Sorry for the epic, you got me started
    Peace,
    Jin

    . Rewarded 8


  • Devils Reject
    February 18

    Edit | Reply
    How many times have I been there?! LOL Very good piece here. I love how you go from being sorry you are there to enjoying it again. BRAVO!

    . Rewarded 4

  • SueRee
    February 18
    Edit | Reply

    Interesting

    Sober to stoned in 6 lines. Good picture if all the down sides of the various indulgences.

  • davidwright silver member
    February 4

    Edit | Reply
    Sounds like a hangover I had one year. A bit scrambled but a damn fine tale of bottoming out. Happy trails neighbor

  • Sagerider
    January 23

    Edit | Reply

    Jimmy, This is grand

    It was like being transported back forty years to the dives on the Kowloon docks or the back streets of Saigon. I could see the neon signs, the unswept rough wood floors. Smell the stale beer and smoke. The girls, smelling like incense saying, "You buy me drink, GI?" After a night or two of this, you were lucky to end up in a Marine redline brig under the tender care of a sadistic Brig Sergeant and guards rather than a foreign jail or ambushed and robbed by a pimp and left beaten in an alley. Oh for the good old days.

    . Rewarded 8


  • Maedes
    January 23

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting title and the rhyme , ...
    Sounds you really need a bit of space; come over here then. JK.
    Goodluck in your contest

    . Rewarded 4

1 - 26 of 26