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[ Perfect ]

Missing image
It’s not because you didn’t stroke my hair
Nor because you weren’t always there
But more because you were everywhere
The way you did everything to show you cared

It’s not because you lied to me
Nor because you could never see
But more because you always could
You were just too perfect, just too good

It’s not because I hate you
Because that’s not really true
But more because I love you
And everything you do

It’s not because you were different
Nor because of the way your time was spent
But more because you weren’t ordinary
You were more extraordinary

It’s not because you hated me
Quite the opposite I hope you see
The way you could love me and let me be
These are the things that so bugged me

So it’s not because you didn’t care
This reason you are now dead
But more because you could always tell
Get inside me and my head

And it’s not because you weren’t great
Nor because you didn’t see
You’re dead by my hand now
Because you were too perfect for me

Author notes

Uh...... yeah......

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Comments

1 - 24 of 24

  • Miss Masquerade
    April 6

    Edit | Reply
    i really like it, your emotions can really be felt in this work. i agree, those too perfect people are very obnoxious.
  • Punzel
    March 24

    Edit | Reply
    Good poem, I get totally annoyed sometimes when people are too perfect. I wanna like, slap them in the face just to make them slap me back. Nice.

  • only1love4ever
    March 10

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    Wow, this is a great poem. It defiently speaks very loud and clear. Although too often people leave their mates because of the lying, the stealing, the drugs, the abuse, I've only ever heard of a few who leave because of them being too perfect. I know that it does happen because no one wants to be with someone who is too good for themselves, then we just downgrade ourselves even worse. This is a very sad poem. Hopefully this didnt happen to you or someone you know. Life does have some pretty crazy throws it's just very interesting how you twisted this so. Very nice little curve ball!

    • GiftedPsychosis gold member
      March 10
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you.
      And no, it hasn't happened to me.
      And I hope it never does.
      Glad you like it and thanks for the comment!

  • VampyEyes
    March 7

    Edit | Reply
    you have a nice way of thinking :] cori is the best! I like the way u write your poems. I lub u! cori makes me happy even if her poems r depressing

  • celadia
    February 22

    Edit | Reply
    I can't believe you're a little girl, this is such an adult poem, it is wonderful that you can write like this at your age. You're not really psychotic are you? I hope not, I believe you will be able to make a living in writing when you grow up. By the way, I liked the twist at the end, the surprise.


    • GiftedPsychosis gold member
      February 22
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you.
      And I am a bit psychotic, but not really murderous.
      :->
      Thanks for the comment.

  • notorious
    February 17

    Edit | Reply
    "Nor because you weren't always there"
    The use of the word 'nor' is always iffy w. me--it sounds extremely awkward in this sentence, and a little too old-fashioned.
    I think you should use the word 'Not' instead, which flows off the tongue better and also matches the rest of the words you use more.

    "Because you were too perfect for me"
    Interesting line, and good for the climax. =)

    • GiftedPsychosis gold member
      February 22
      Edit | Reply
      I don't know.
      The more I say it, the more I like the word 'nor' instead of 'not' there.
      But thank you for the comment.
      Glad you liked it :->

  • IfTomorrowNeverCame silver member
    February 7

    Edit | Reply
    This is random as all hell. Love the picture by the way.

    This is the type of poem that just as I think I'm understanding the truth behind it, it changes. It's crazy, but I love that. Excellent skill for a thirteen year old. Welcome to the finalists list

    ♥Bandaid

  • Zero-
    February 7
    Edit | Reply
    wow interesting me likes lol


  • Innocent Evil
    February 7

    Edit | Reply
    hmmm... ironic, i didnt really expect the end. but its good.... hope ya win, i love it! .


  • lemonhead
    February 7

    Edit | Reply
    WOW! interesting!Its twisted! Wonderful job! I hope you win!
    I love it
    Lemonhead

  • Tide
    February 7

    Edit | Reply
    Because you were to perfect for me

    Its "too" not "to"
    Lol but other than that great poem

1 - 24 of 24