~by Gregg Rowe~
erect--
my corspe awakes,
chronic pain from Zona:
cool spring photgraphic dreams die
out as reality's lights shock hazel
eyes into today; remember
those days when I could stand
like the lain branch--
erect
Author notes
SHERIDAN GLACIER PHOTOS
Sheridan Glacier, Chugach National Forest, Cordova, Alaska
Photos of Cordova, Alaska
Author's Clues in his poem:
Prompt: picture given (does't stipulate if whole picture or part of picture) , as spring (there's only one thing to do in spring which kinda has a springy movement to it) is just around the corner.
This time we are using ONLY the Rictameter for your Form ~
Syllable count:
2
4
6
8
10
8
6
4
2
First and last (2 ) syllable word/s, must be the same ~
A contest entry
- Poetry Formed XXIV by Arkbear.
500 points, ended March 3, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Very best wishes in the contest!
I am sooooo out of my league!
Write on!
*PEACE*
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This is one of the BEST poems I have read in ages! The form is perfect and I found this to be beautifully etched. The whole sequence of transformation is perfect.
. Rewarded 4
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Thanks for the read, a perfect description of yourself; me; anyone else; and a branch.
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Gregg, so happy to meet up with you again! PLease look over this poem. There is a misspelling in line 4 which screws up the syllable count. I see a very deep personal thought that shows the real you. How have you been? I miss getting emails from you. I have never forgotten you. MY son, with the same disease, is doing well. Best wishes in this contest!
Shana
. Rewarded 6
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Nice words
This just didn't seem to flow well to me. I imagined die moved from line 4 to 5 and the word out eliminated. Then shock hazel eyes into today next line Remember for line 7 please let me know if there is a reason I am missing. I enjoyed very much just had to read twice. Thanks for sharing.
. Rewarded 6
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good luck with the contest inventive follow from the prompt this section was very good:"remember
those days when I could stand
like the lain branch--
erect" thanks for sharing regards zaj
. Rewarded 4
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Oh what a stinker
But a very good take on the muse keep UP the good work here
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Hey Gregg ~
A total brilliant piece of personification with you and the picture ~
I love it when a Poet can use Flow, instead of punctuation......it makes for better aesthetics with the Form ~
....which I want to mention ~
If you are going to use the Rictameter Form, it has a syllable count, which will allow you to form that perfect diamond shape......and yet I don't tell Poets how to form their syllabaic lines, I always think you should do whatever to present your form as Art, as well as a great poem :)
Nice job for sure........and I felt a great Tone and Focus on your Topic.....really stands out ~
The best to you and your Ric in the contest,
Bear ~
:)
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