I never noticed it before,
but the sky is such
a vibrant blue,
like the rolling sea below.
I never noticed it before,
but the grass is such
a deep cool green.
Like the evergreens above.
I never noticed it before,
but a smile is such like
the brightness of the sun,
as it rings out clear in beauty
from a misty mountain
high in the morn'.
I never noticed it before,
but the sound of laughter
is like a clear ringing bell
that sings through the darkest
of sorrows and bleak times.
I never noticed it before,
but a trickle of water
becomes a roaring fall,
with just a little imagination.
I never noticed it before,
but an ordinary day
suddenly transforms
into an epic adventure
with just a few friends
and a woods to roam.
(The one in which
we shall complete our quest
to save the land.)
I never noticed it before,
but a simple poem,
just about life,
becomes something great.
Something really memorable
with just a little work
and some great friends to inspire.
I never noticed it before
but life isn't just
all about existing.
It's all about learning to live.
Because, believe you me,
there is a big difference
in existing and living.
Living isn't really so hard.
It's all just about smiling,
even when it hurts.
And it's all just about laughing,
until you can hardly breathe.
And maybe, just maybe,
it's all about learning to love;
love with your whole heart
and love what you've got.
Something tells me,
(something loud mind you)
today isn't just another day,
a day for existing.
Today is a day for living .
Author notes
Well... I was kinda in the mood for this one. It wasn't forced to me. I don't know. Any thoughts? I rather liked this piece. After being in such a dark mood for a while, it was nice to write about the light again. ^.^ Hope you enjoyed this one. I had fun writing it.
Night-Owl (Aka: Amanda)
I hope this one made you smile. I really do. I think everyone needs a smile. I'd like to think this brought one.
A contest entry
- Cricket Preliminaries by B Chandler.
450 points, ended April 19, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - your most very personal poetry♥ by YoureNoGoodForMe.
475 points, ended September 7, 78 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comment honestly please. But don't be rude. CONSTRUCTIVE CRISTISM is welcome. But don't bash me; I work hard.
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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I really liked this. Wonderfully written, dear. I honestly can't even pick out a favorite stanza, I liked the whole entire thing =] Thank you so much for sharing this. I can relate so well. Keep it up & good luckkk ! ♥
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wow - such depth in these words....lovely! I think there are too many things, sometimes, in life that we really don't notice - we just take them for granted. I like how you have shown the things you noticed - a nice, hopeful, happy feel to this. And I really last your last 2 verses and how you ended this. And you are so right - today is a day for living (I just wrote on that this morning...lol).
Well done!
best wishes in your contest.
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Very nice ...
and very nicely done. I wrote a poem on this subject too, "The Secret Is To Live, Not Just Exist".
Anyway, good job, all in all.
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This was amazing.
I mean, how many things do we not notice
i mean every day things...and that reminded me
of that..very great write,
greatness was written here,and
i am proud of you for this.
..Simply Me♥ -
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Thank you very much.
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welcome
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you probably could've cut down on the repetitions, but overall this was a good piece, well penned.
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I agree. I am still thinking of edits to make. Thanks for the advice. I'm sure I'll change this one in minor ways soon.
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I had a look at this poem yesterday and I came back to read it again because it so very nice. Reminds me of the joy we can have in this world through the simple things like nature. A wonderful reminder, thank you.
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Thank you.
That was my goal.
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This is so beautiful I barely know what to say this was so touching unbelievable you are so talented wish I could write this well!
~Ocean~
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Thank you. I'm not all that talented. I'm sure you could easily write as well as me. It not better. Thanks again.
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i liked it...it shows honestly how much simple things that are often overlooked can be so miraculous...great write
peace, love, & cheese -
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Thanks.
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Commentary Thoughts
Normally, I would frown upon repetition unless it's done right. In this instance, it was done correctly because there was a point to be made with the repetitious line, 'I never noticed it before' BUT at the same time, a too good of a thing can be true. I think if you were to remove the last two first lines of the last two stanzas (meaning remove the line of, "I never noticed it before" in last two stanzas) then just leave them as they are, the point would come across more strongly than at first appearance -
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Thank you for the advice. I agree and I fixed it.
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This is friggin awesome Owl. you should publish this one, it could lose a set or two, but other than that, this exemplifies what poetry should be, a pretty way to say something.
good deal , Mark H.
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I'd publish it if I could. Hehe. Yes, I agree. I will be editing and taking away a few things and adding some. I'm not sure yet. Thank you.
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Well done ^.^ --hands you a gold star and A+-- This poem is beautiful and touching, great work!!
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Thank you. Yay!!! A gold star! And and and A too! I feel so special. Hehe. Thanks again.
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