fire burns inside you
the bright flames burning
higher and higher
the boiling blood inside your veins
fills your eyes with crimson heat,
drowning you
until the flames turn white,
and they consume you,
as you draw your final breath.
Author notes
The hatred no human could ever handle.
A contest entry
- Completely Corporate - Round 1 by Midnight-x-Rose.
300 points, ended July 3, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
1. Topic touched upon appropriately? - 16
2. Expressive, Unique, Creative? - 16
3. Grammar/Spelling correct/appropriate? - 17
4. Title and opening closing lines well chose? - 17
5. Personal liking to the poem wrote? - 16
Total: 82 -
A very powerful poem. I like the images it creates and that it allows you to feel that it is actually happening to you. I don't know which bit is my favourite as each line is equally as important as the others. Well done and good luck in the contest.



