so deeply, madly, without me?
Summer is upon us,
and like time in a basket
I swing from your hand,
covered in maddening patience.
I have tried to reach you
with warm words and wild yearnings,
using contentment as a bridge
over the roar of my river.
My threads will still weave stairs
with the abandon of a wild flower,
over your unwavering tall trees
and breeze into our garden.
I will touch your tender back
with my eyes only,
so you will not turn around
and lose your needed focus.
Your eyes eat me up and bare
the spirit of love,
while I blindly listen
to the music of my tears.
Tight, this mouth;
the heartbeat breathing
of my cares to you,
knowing how your lips would feel
as your tongue pried me open
and parted my vagrant heart
with your veracious song.
Instead, the truth you sow
reaps rewards
as I watch you go
deeply, madly, without me...
the patient one.
Author notes
A contest entry for: Pen Me A Parallel - Commitment Contest 4 -
In this fourth contest, I would like a parallel of favorite poem on AP.
Please get permission and put the poem in your author's notes.
Poem a parallel, or an answer, or take their poem further with one of your own…....
a more serious borrowing of ideas/style etc or to construct an answer poem
Reprinted with permission from Wanda Lea Brayton,
My Fav Poem... http://allpoetry.com/poem/3510154
"The Patient One" by Night Hope.
Your eyes shone
with compassion & understanding
as you quietly listened to my soul
as it spilled out as waves over a shattered dam ~
it once would have pulled me under,
drowning me in sorrows' surging.
Your hand held mine,
midnight swaying between us,
warm & secure, silently saying
you were there
& would be whenever
I needed you.
You heard my stories as I rambled,
trying to make sense from the unexplainable,
yet you grasped it all within your heart
& knew what I was trying so hard to define.
There is pain in this world that cannot be alleviated,
only borne by bent shoulders, standing tall.
There is joy in this life
that even beauty cannot bear.
There are moments of comfort
whispering to us all
& you always hear the movement
of my song,
even when I cannot find
the music or the words...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Picture: "Dream with your eyes open" Courtesy of "PhotoBucket"
In a list
- Beautiful Words by Beautiful People I Know • next in list
- Honorable Mention • next in list
- TROPHIED POEMS • next in list
A contest entry
- Hell - Pen Me A Parallel - Commitment Contest 4 - Invitation Only by CarolDesjarlais.
1050 points, ended July 31, 5 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Excellent
What expression!Dream with your eyes open..Great Write.
Conni' -
I wonder if there are soul writers like there are soul mates? Nicky, I can only sigh over these words and find my own words inadequate to express the feeling I have reading your poem. I'm caught in the current "while I blindly listen to the music of my tears..."
Sometimes, the tears are responsible for rainbows. What would we do without the moments that leave us their treasure?

You also made me think of the admonition: Never ask for patience, God will give it to you!"


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What an imapcting poem...deeply, madly, without me...what power:
'using contentment as a bridge
over the roar of my river. "
"Your eyes eat me up and bare"
"Tight, this mouth;
the heartbeat breathing "
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i love contentment as a bridge-
i have been feeling contented lately in my work life
and that expression is perfect for me-
some lovely thoughts run through this one.
m

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I like your concentrated on-point writing. I can read you and not stray since you stay with the main precept of the poem. next, your images are superb. last you open yourself up on your poetry and I feel akin to you as the writer when you do that. I like poetry that exposes the hearts of the writers.


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It reads so beautifully, a mirror image and dare I say more than a little longing for the poetess herself
You do it justice. Love, C


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Wanda's poetry is always soothing and richly stated.
Almost to a calming effect on me....
after reading both I found that you too had that effect on me...the repetition of your title was nice as well
well done poet
I know Wanda is proud
best wishes
peace Muddy

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Love Love
Wonderful poem very well done, An excruciating and powerful piece of Poetry
very well done There were no errors. Or No typos. that. I Would change. I look forward to your next poem












