Oh masterpiece
Oh cenotaph
Oh canvas cloak
So slow and rough
I cannot paint your portrait
Cause it wouldn稚 have a scar
I cannot repair the damage
Caused by the speeding cars
I can only paint the likeness of only one soul
And that痴 me
I知 disfigured beyond belief
Sweetest of souls
You値l never grow old
While I fade away
Into the grey sky
You値l watch me fall
Into a chasm
With or without
The wings to fly
Oh atmosphere
Oh Daedalus
Oh foolish flight
Oh Icarus
Stay here with us
Do not move closer
To the azure dome
You値l be stricken down with jealousy
To your mortal home
And if you declare impunity
I am right behind you
Not for support, but sheepishness
I cannot extract my heart from this mess
Sweetest of souls
You値l never grow old
While I fade away
Into the grey sky
You値l watch me fall
Into a chasm
With or without
The wings to fly
You had me weighted down
I enjoyed your leaden burden
For it was what kept me running
The stone痴 ajar
The wheel is turning
I am not working for your benefit
Not for you to have me sit
And tell me of your noble cause
Till the leaves are gripped by frost
Sweetest of souls
You値l never grow old
While I fade away
Into the grey sky
You値l watch me fall
Into a chasm
With or without
The wings to fly
You could tell me you understood
That you値l always be there
And I wouldn稚 care
If it were all lies.
Author notes
For this contest, the song I recieved was "Hallejuah" by Paramore. I chose to look at the lyrics by themselves, to immerse myself in their meaning.
What I got out of the song was the desire for immortality, but not just immortality: immortality with one's loved one. Taking that basic concept, I decided to craft a response to the lyrics of the poem that was actually inspired by the work of a singer-songwriter who also wrote a song called "Hallejuah", Leonard Cohen. However, while the song's lyrics are quite hopeful, the response would be quite dark.
"Sweetest of Souls" explores our deepest desires and how we can become blind to obvious facts when those desires are acted upon. The song by Paramore expresses a desire to make time go on forever; in my song, time has a definite limit, but for the protagonist and not for the person to whom the song is addressed. I used the Greek myth of Daedalus and Icarus (in brief, a father and son build wings to escape their prison and Daedalus, the father, warns his son Icarus to not fly too close to the sun or his wings will melt. Icarus is so overwhelmed with the experience of flying that he does exactly that, and Daedalus has to live the rest of his life dealing with that, that notion that life is precious and every second counts) to put another perspective on the song's message, this time giving it an added layer of meaning relating to family relationships as well.
You can see I put some thought into this. 
aquaman
TheDreamsMalfunction
A contest entry
- Lyrics To Be, Songs Of You (Reserve Your Spot Now) by HereComesTheSun.
850 points, ended August 26, 13 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
this is going to be so hard to judge
your work is fabulous, i love greek mythology just becuase it has messages just as the lessons jesus spoke of. your piece is so fantastic and well written i just gasp in aw of the amazing write your a finalist for sure, great write and good luck
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