Blowing in this ice cold wind
Chills my bones to a bitter end
Silently crying wish I was dying
Destroying my sanity to my very end
Watch me cry and sigh at night
No one knows why I lie
Just watch me wish my end is near
I just want to blow away forever... my dear
- Fuzzy Fluffy Fuzz Balls Who Are Very Bored at This Moment In Time and Say That Are Cooler Than You and Are Awesomer Than You So Too Bad for You group list • next in list
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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thank you for this entry to my contest
this poem is really touching, but its not an ABC acrostic, i think it needs a little tweeking to meet my requirments
keep writing
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this takes my sad part of me away
the poem was well done the flow and such was well
hurtful at the end but yet it feels so true
great poem hun
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I
Hmm Nice write and lovely poetry. It's pesimistic, sad, feeling and shows some over-whelming emotions uncontrolled and turned into words! I liked the way the poem is written, the feelings even and the poem is short too! But one thing that life is fair to none and life is bitter! Well I liked these lines:
' Silently crying wish I was dying
Destroying my sanity to my very end"
" just want to blow away forever... my dear "
show the sorrow well!
Well keep on writing and let your Golden scrolls fall on paper! Good Luck!
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Well written Mike. The poem effectively employs rhyme in a very skilful way to shock and create empathy for the speaker. The use of "my dear" is clever too as it normally links with affection but in this instance the effect is the opposite. Good use of metaphor too. Tony
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captures a dark state of mind to be sure, and the juxtaposition of the despair with the phrase 'my dear' is effective
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Awe. That's cute Mike. Well, a little morbid, but, hey, I'm weird enough to think morbid things are cute. It's somewhat, romantic in a way. If you are writing this for someone I mean, because of the "my dear" thing. I like it.
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Wow
This is really good hun..Loved every word!
especially the two last lines..Great write hun..amazing -
WOW very profound I liked it and the emotion was felt I knew you could write...
always~Steph
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hey
so what are u up to
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awwwwww *ish now your dear*
lol anyway this was great *hugs and kisses to a dear friend and ex (odd combo i know)* keep it up!
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beautiful
Tragic and heart wrenching. Bery sad dear,but I truly love it!
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awesome ^_^
okay well nighty night
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Awwww....this was so beautiful *witled_rose*
see i knew you could write a poem....Great work. Kisses
misa
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