I get up in the morning; it's a warm sunny day.
I insert my contacts and put my glasses away.
Wearing a t-shirt that I bought yesterday,
I pour myself a heaping bowl of Special K.
My mom stops me as I head out the door.
She tells me "I love you" like when I was four.
I tell her that back, (just to even the score)
Then pick up my backpack from the hardwood floor.
I spend a few minutes on the 14 bus route,
And thank the bus driver for a pleasant commute.
When I finally reach school, I let out a hoot,
Because a new guy walks by, and damn is he cute.
My classes go fast 'cause they interest me.
When did period 1 change to period 3?
I get back some quizzes in World History
So far they're good marks: 2 As and a B.
Lunch arrives just on time with the 12:00 bell.
The day seems to be going remarkably well.
My friend calls me up on my sparkly new cell.
I ask her: "How's Paris? Do you like your hotel?"
I meet my school friends at nearby Burger King.
We sit down and eat and we talk about things.
"Did you hear about Andrew and Monica's fling?"
"How much do you think Nancy paid for her ring?"
The end of the school day is just like the start.
On my desks there are doodles of Lisa and Bart
Or Batman and Robin, or just squiggles and hearts.
My classes whiz by: Physics, English, and Art.
After school's done, I'm back on the 14.
The aisle is dirty, but at least my seat's clean.
When I get home Mom asks, "How's your day been?"
I respond, to a T, like your average teen.
"Just fine." I reply, then head up the stairs,
And spend a few hours in the computer chair.
Occasionally, it's homework I'm doing there,
But mostly I'm hypnotized by the screen's glare.
Be it Facebook, or Youtube, or just MSN,
I sit 'til about half past six, which is when
My family eats dinner and chatters and then
I head back upstairs at around 7:10.
I then mess around for a couple of hours,
And do some more homework, and then take a shower,
Then play with my brother (we build a block tower)
Until I get tired and run out of power.
I brush my teeth (they are glisteningly white)
Then get in my PJs and turn off the light.
(I think of those bedbugs; I won't let them bite.)
I turn on my music to block out the night.
A popular song, "Backseat of my Jeep",
keeps playing (my iTunes is stuck on repeat).
The lyrics are simple and not very deep;
They overcome me...
As I cry.
Myself.
To sleep.
*
How did you think my day would end?
Not like that, I suppose.
All I do is pretend,
And nobody knows.
No one sees thorny stems beneath this velvet rose.
From my plastered-on smile,
To my trend-chasing style,
To my perfectly lacquered maroon-coloured toes,
My facade is a crutch upon which I depend;
It's the airbrushed dispatch I methodically send.
This strife
And this pain
Like the prick of a knife
Slowly draining my life...
I restrain
And contain
It again
And again,
But the stray drops of blood
Are creating a stain;
An ark-worthy flood
Eroding my soul
'Til a large gaping hole
Is all that remains
Of my forgotten self...
Up high on a shelf,
The real me decays
Day by drearisome day.
And I'm doomed to reside
In this plastic array,
Bright and cheerful outside
While my insides are grey.
Devoid of meaning,
I slowly fade away.
Author notes
Maybe we should think twice about who people really are, underneath it all.
any suggestions? (be as mean as you want)
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Wow, I really enjoyed this poem. It was simply amazing. And though I can't say I know what you're going through, I can definitely relate. It just feels like every day you're putting on a show and at the end of the day only you know who you are, and it's a scary way to live. Anyhow, like I said earlier, I really liked this. The consistent rhyming was very entertaining, keep writing! =]
~gracing smile~
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wow what can anyone say to that
This is probably the best piece i have read on here for a while it is very very cleverly crafted the rhyme and rhythm are near perfect and the detail and imagrybyou create for us is wonderful too this is a volatile and thought provoking write with the cleverist twist at the end thanks so much for sharing
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A teenage girl killed herself in Winnipeg early this month. The only reason it actually made headlines was because her parents and her friends all described her as the happiest person they knew, with no social problems, with no depression or disorders or issues with her school. There wasn't much in the article, not a lot to be said, really. Like a 'Said The Gramophone' article had written two years ago, all I could think about was the fact that the few people I have known who have killed themselves have done so at this time of year. In the fall. That isn't an insight, just a sad piece of trivia.
Depression is, nine times out of ten, a very personal experience. Sure, your friends think they know when you're depressed, and you talk to them about it and they say "I understand". And, maybe they actually do, but it's still the most hollow sentence you'll ever hear pass their lips. There's no way to express it in words, or even in tangible feelings. It's unspeakable.
The novelist William Styron wrote a great short book about his own depression called Darkness Visible: A Memoir of Madness, outlining his preparations for suicide, eventual hospitalization, and recovery. Speaking of the strange lack of an appropriate vernacular for communicating depression he says, "To most who have experienced it, the horror of depression is so overwhelming as to be quite beyond expression, hence the frustrated sense of inadequacy found in the work of even the greatest artists."
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You have a great sense of rhyme, it is so natural....
as I began to read it I thought wow, so happy and perfect. The the lines..
"As I cry.
Myself.
To sleep."
..catch me off guard.
In my little world you have made a huge statement. (we aren't all as happy as we seem) I personally learned a lot from this poem.
Amazing job. Thank you for writing this.
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oh the intensity
it rips and shreds into the soul of the reader (this reader anyway) "I'm doomed to reside
In this plastic array,
Bright and cheerful outside
While my insides are grey."
aint it the truth? ... lol keep 'em comming
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OMG get help
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You lie!!!!!
I can't add much to other's comments. This poem speaks eloquently anyway...and the dislocation in style of the two sections works perfectly.I love long poems that take you in.
However I think there is one big lie in here.
Anyone who can write, think , dream, reflect as you do
can not possibly have "grey insides"
You are clearly packed with jewels and understand the preciousness of life ....and the depths of a human psyche....
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I take it you ran out of things to ryme with. Good job anyway.
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ran out... why?
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I like the twist, it's like getting two poems for the price of one, LOL. Good job!
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lol that is pretty funny
i agree with ur an -
"How did you think my day would end"
You see it coming...Only because alot of our days start end that way, even out of high school. We all put on this face it was nice to however read about it instead of just feel it. Good Job! Keep It Up
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Sooo long yet it all in like one sentance, you wrote it very very well. It flows well and is easy to feel and understand. I like how you started it cheerful and casual and then ended it with a fact that we all just see the surface of things, this made the ending unexpected.
Indeed, I think we all need to look beneath the surface and see what people hide behind their smiles.
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I love this, it flows so well. The whole thing flows so well. I don't normally read anything in this style, but you did it so beautifully, and the ryhme..The ending is sudden and unexpected and poignant. I was sure it was about you, then I read the AN.. If it is, I just hope you don't always feel like this- but what do I know? Great write!!
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wow! definately did not see that coming! i like it alot! i cxan definately realate to it and your right people should think twice! a briliant write well done.
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This is beautifully done. I liked the first part about going through the motions of a normal teenage day. Then the change in the second part was very deep and touching. it really makes you think about the people around you.
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Wow, this is a great piece. The rhythm and rhyming in the beginning are great, so neat and "perfect" and the change really helps carry the idea home.
As someone who has lived through what you are going through (and it is truly miserable) I hope that one day you can find a way to let your family know how you feel. You sound like a truly special person (with a real gift for writing poetry) and while it may be hard to see at times, your family truly loves you for who you are, not what you do for them, and should be able to help you see you don't feel the way you do.
Best of luck in life and with your writing. This is a fabulous piece.
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Wow, it starts off so clean.
So daily, which I enjoyed...
I loved the last stanza of the first part of the poem.
Then the change of style, rhythm and pace... and I wonder about you.
Now I go read some more of yours.
(And tell you I liked this one so much I bookmarked it!) -
Oh, wow. This was intense. The rhyme was really really well done and not forced at all, which is extremely admirable with a poem of this length. It's definatly something we should think about. This was a fantasticfantasticfantastic! poem.
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This is awesome. I really liked the beginning of the second half.
"How did you think my day would end?
Not like that, I suppose.
All I do is pretend,
And nobody knows.
No one sees thorny stems beneath this velvet rose.
From my plastered-on smile,
To my trend-chasing style,
To my perfectly lacquered maroon-coloured toes,
My facade is a crutch upon which I depend;
It's the airbrushed dispatch I methodically send."
Your rhyme is great there, and though it does decline a bit as it goes on, the entire poem is amazing. I mean, it shows the day of a lot of typical teens, and I think we can all say we occasionally put up a facade. Absolutely great job portrayiong this.
I also loved your style in the beginning, because you described something so typical, in such typical language, and somehow made it beautiful as you did this. As for your rhyme scheme, I totally loved it.
Okay, maybe I should just say I loved the whole poem, Great job!!!!!
--Victoria
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