Violent violet victory
over the vicious heat of the day.
Velvet fields of verbana,
Your intentions are vulgar,
even as I am vulnerable.
Voicelessness,
non-vocal, incredibly visual,
my virtue violated.
[You won't even remember this.]
My view on life turns vexatious,
a vicious villain
creeping as a vine.
Playing this violin
doesn't help me vent.
These verses venal,
vibrant vigils veiled.
[You'll forget that twilight.]
vaporised, vanquished, and vanished,
I've lost my value.
[Your vagrancy has left me vacant.]
Author notes
Prompt: Twilight
Pic Creds: Pain by Blurry Mirror at deviantArt.com
Border Creds:
Despair by Saca at deviantArt.com
Despair by jadorechanter at deviantArt.com
Don't Look at Me by Delighted Masquerade at deviantArt.com
*Notes: sorry. You know how when you start writing with one thing in mind and memories and demons take over?
A contest entry
- Pick Words Like Flowers Quickie (48 hrs) by poet2angels.
475 points, ended September 27, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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Well written. There's a lot of alliteration going on here. This is a very expressive write with powerful imagery. It flows together nicely as well. Thanks for sharing.
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to tell a truth it brings back meemores of long showers head down in the water with the water poring over my face wishing for some one any one to see the taers that were falling.. loved the memore
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Excellent
I like your alliterative use of the "v" sound...often one's poetry is blood on the page...I hope writing this poem was cathartic for you... -
I adore the alliteration in this piece. It's very sharp and aggressive, sort of gets in the reader's face. Wonderful, just beautiful.
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woah. this is by far the best i've read from you. I love it!!! you did such a wonderful job, its a wonder you didn't win the gold
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Popcorn!!!
.... in response to your hotdog
lol
awesome write here hun your usage of alliteration is fantabulous and feeds the tone and the imagery, superb
luvs ya
Tasha
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Your alliteration is amazing! The poem itself is also very well written and the message... wow. The pain can almost be felt through your work. Very well done.
~Allie~
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umthat was cool as hell I liked it alot and good use of the letter "v" lol
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Brilliant!
This is an awesome poem. The pain pours from every line. If I could give 10 applauses I would
Pam
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this was an amazing write i loved every line of it and was addicted from the start,m well done on such an incredible write.
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Very Clever
You have cleverly used V words to describe the emotions of a Victim without using the word victim. Well written under such self imposed restrictions. Truly a stunning piece of wit and creativity. I enjoyed it.
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Its so emotional and beautiful. So much in so little. My first thought scanning was its like the "Sally Sells Sea Shells by the Sea shore" type idea but its beautiful and thought pervoking.
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this is beautiful and powerful. Draws out very strong emotion. It's so sad and lonely. I love the alliteration.
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Wow this is amazing you did a very very wonderful job!! This is excelllent and well portrayed!!! You did a beautiful job!! This is very sad I can feel the pain and emotion behind this write!! You did a great job expressing your feelings!!
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Very Good
I enjoyed thissweetly penned well adapted well worded poem here. the motion and flow through out the poem was well done and I just like the over all impact you create upon us all. any ways good work
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WOW!!! This is such an emotive piece of penning. Great alliteration woven throughout - a constant poignancy of thought revealed. Pained and bitter shaded of revelry unbound. Nicely penned!
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Oh my goodness
Your word usage is so elaborate and stunning
It adds not only depth to this piece, but power behind your words.
This was an exceptional poem.
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Strong, powerful! Your alliteration of the "V" words packed a punch! Well done!
best wishes in your contest.
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WOW!! I love your words here. The alliteration is awesome! Powerful piece! Best of luck in the contest.
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i don't think you have to say sorry for nothing, this is a strong and moving poem, keep it flowign and good luck in the contest
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WOW! this was a brutally powerful poem!
Stole our breath away....i loved how you kept
her spirit alive ........boldly fighting the
powers of dark!
loved it! and oh hell ya...you know how you start
writing with one thing in mind and memories and
demons take over? (YOU HAVE NO IDEA! (giggle) )
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Amazing use of language and alliteration throughout...
UNique take on the word and such emotion!
Ty for entering this awesome piece
Lynda
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