Mixed Emotions

Anger

I'm angry for what he did to me
Angry that I can't let it go
Angry that I can't move on with my life
That he didn't listen when I said 'no'
Because he thought he had the right
To break me in that way
Because my love and trust were broken
And I'll never be the same again
I'm angry that I'll never get answers
About the things I need to know
Angry that he's still in my head
And yet I can't let my pain show

Confused

I'm confused about what he did
Was it really that bad?
Did it really happen to me?
Why has it made me this sad?
I'm confused about my feelings
A part of me still loves that man
The one who broke the young girl that I was
I don't understand how I can?
I'm confused about everything
That is going on in my head
Am I crazy? Am I sane?
Do I want to be alive or dead?

Hate

I hate him for what he's done to me
Hate him for all of this
Hate that he probably doesn't even realise
That his ignorance is surely bliss
I hate him for making me hate myself
I hate him for the memories inside
I hate him for the pain and hurt that I feel
And that I can't get rid of him, though I've tried
I hate everything about this life
That for me, maybe it's too late
But most of all I hate him for
Making me feel this hate

Hurt

I hurt every single day
Will my hurt ever leave?
He took away a huge part of me
And for that life, I'll forever grieve
I hurt physically and emotionally
I hurt in every single way
I don't want to be like this forever
Earth is no longer a place I want to stay
I'm walking round, an empty shell
Hurting because of all the emotions I feel
Why did this have to happen to me?
I wish that none of this was real