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Brimful bird table

brimful bird table
in window
man with gun

Author notes

6. write about power, simply power...
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1. Death
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*Express any feelings or emotions that you may have repressed, about anything, no matter how ashamed you are of them.
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15. “How can blood be our salvation
And justify the pain that we have caused throughout the times”
The Truth Beneath the Rose
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"Totally mad. Utter nonsense. But we'll do it because it's brilliant nonsense." ~ Douglas Noel Adams
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Option1:
Scare me. Make me cry. Can you answer this question: Can you make me feel like dying inside ?
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Eckahrt: "A new species is arising on the planet. It is arising now, and you are it." - My ironic response. There is more and more killers...
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3)In a World of Misery
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Secretary of Haiku
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Zvrhlík

A contest entry

Is grammar O.K? I´m not native speaker. So I can make a mistake very easy. [Reward: double points]

    I plan to revise this poem, please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 32 of 32

  • BorntothePurple
    November 29
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    Edit | Reply
    Wow, lots of contests. good luck, I hope you get a trophy out of this one. It's really intriguing,and yes, the grammer is fine.

  • breedluv silver member
    November 28
    Edit | Reply
    Just a little too random. Thank you!

  • Dark Otter gold member
    November 26
    Edit | Reply

    Interesting haiku!

    A twisted image of death staring out.

  • The Fun House gold member
    November 22
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    Edit | Reply
    Well this certainly leaves an image in the mind when you read it LOL. That is the way to make an impact without being too wordy at all. Well done.


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    November 22
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    Edit | Reply
    Wow, you have entered this into a lot of contests. That can be off-putting, you may consider removing them from some of the older ones that are closed if you didn't place.

    Good haiku, thank you for entering the contest.

    ♥
    whisper
  • Vera Rich gold member
    November 20
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    Edit | Reply
    Sorry - you seem to have misunderstood the rules of my "Celebrating poetry and poets" competition. For as far as I can see, your entry refers to neither. I wish you luck with this piece elsewhere - but for this particular competition, I have, regretfully to say "No"

  • blondeoverblue gold member
    November 20
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    Edit | Reply
    Is there any contest on AP that this poem hasn't been entered in? Perhaps you should actually read the requirements some time.

  • BarbedWireButterfly
    November 20
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    This is no where near what I was looking for. It doesn't follow the rules or even fit in with the topic of the contest.

  • Danna Hobart
    November 17
    Edit | Reply
    Nice use of imagery. Thanks for entering.

  • Pandorea
    November 15

    Edit | Reply
    whoa. entered in a lot of contests

    nice...for something so short. i jsut felt it was a bit too abrupt.

    thanks for entering, anyway

  • BigotCretin
    November 14

    Edit | Reply
    Are you just seeing how many people you can impress with utter nonsense? Of course, your eight words can be interpreted to mean many things, but that doesn't mean that it is a worthy entry to my contest.
    You lost. But try again if you wish.
    Thanks.

  • wingsofgold25 silver member
    November 11
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for your entry
    Good luck in the contest.
    ED.
  • ApathysEnemy
    November 8
    Edit | Reply
    I'm not sensing enough of the hate here. It's powerful, yes. But it's not hate in any way

  • HolyMan28
    November 7
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for wasting my time. This is completely unrelated.

  • Just Forget Me
    November 7
    Edit | Reply
    wow, this made no sense. goes great with the prompt! =]

  • poetrandy gold member
    November 6
    Edit | Reply

    Crazy, Yes!

    Thanks for this "Wild" entry! good luck in the contest!


  • fluffatron69
    November 2
    Edit | Reply
    This poem was very vivid, and prompted my mind to picture the scene without concious thought. I enjoyed it, despite the short length, and it says so much in so few lines! Good write and good luck in the contest!

    . Rewarded 4


  • mcw120588
    October 31
    Edit | Reply
    i sense a pattern in your use of animals and then shocking ending lines. the essence of a man with a gun and the bird i assume connects to the prompt listed about dying? if so then i think i understand were you are going and it is an interesting write.
  • burningchild
    October 31
    Edit | Reply

    its ok

    there is vision potential. the haiku is pretty good but it barely makes sense.

  • StormGoddess Greeters member
    October 28

    Edit | Reply
    For some reason, my first reaction was to laugh, as this reminded me of something totally different. Gets the point across for a short little thing. Thank you for entering and good luck. Storm
  • trekkergirl silver member
    October 24

    Edit | Reply
    If I was the bird I would be saying eeekkkk. This is a very well written poem. Thanks for entering this into my contest. And thanks for sharing this with all of us. It is a nice write.

    . Rewarded 4


  • writeroftoast
    October 23
    Edit | Reply
    Not sure if this fits the contest... but good haiku all the same.

  • Pisces rainbow
    October 23
    Edit | Reply
    well not exactly what I was looking for
    but thank you for your entry
    God bless you

  • SmokinHotWhiteTiger
    October 22

    Edit | Reply

    Impressive

    Wowza!!!! I am completley blowna way at this haiku of yours poet. I mean my goodness this really is a power packed haiku you have penned here and the disturbing images that ran through my mind really got to me and I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!! I really love the depth flow and imagery through out this write and th wording you chose was superb. any ways excellent work and the very best of luck in all of the contests you are in keep on penning away these haikus

    . Rewarded 8


  • Olivia33
    October 18
    Edit | Reply
    whoa; the ending really got me!

  • bananasfoster42
    October 16

    Edit | Reply
    hmmm this has a deep meaning that i'm too sleepy to grasp at the moment. LOL! great haiku, thanks for entering!

  • Lislaine
    October 15
    Edit | Reply
    This is really amazing!!


  • Lislaine
    October 15
    Edit | Reply
    hmm...

  • Symphony
    October 15

    Edit | Reply
    Ohmygoodness! My mouth dropped open wide [literally] when I realised what you meant by this, and it sent shivers down my spine. God, imagine it, the poor birds twittering and hopping around on the bird table and then - a loud bang - and flying winds, frantically chirping, batting against one another in fervent attempts to take off, and then, silence, lone dropping feathers - and a dead body, bleeding, perhaps scattered parts from the extent of the collision ...

    My goodness, that's all of what hit me after reading this; and it horrifies me. You obviously worded it brilliantly in order to evoke such a response, but, oh dear [shudder].


  • Manoj Sanyal
    October 14
    Edit | Reply
    I had to read it many times to understand.
    Good luck,

  • leave.an.impression
    October 14
    Edit | Reply
    Ty for entering and good luck
  • Starz of Heaven gold member
    October 10

    Edit | Reply
    Hehe Dinner
    I like this thank you muchly for taking the time to enter my contest best wishes always goodluck
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