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the things of junkyards

paper cranes
a thousand wishes
inconsequential bits
of past recreation
unfold

I don't call it a nightmare
or think of it as a dream
though I sleep
like tomorrow would fade
into baggy eyes and fitted jeans

dusty intentions
remain unclear behind
a science textbook

glossy pages juxtapose rough tears -
he notices the way only
a science teacher would

like something shameful
that had to be studied

- I haven't

Author notes

Prompt: Surrender

Zombie - Miser

A contest entry

I want a chocolate-glazed donut.

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 23 of 23

  • LadyDementia gold member
    October 12

    Edit | Reply
    MMmm sounds good, with sprinkles of course I love the phrase 'baggy eyes' seen my reflections haven't you Excellent take on the prompt hun, good luck


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    October 11

    Edit | Reply
    Wishes often unfold as they are inconsequential...

    "like tomorrow would fade
    into baggy eyes and fitted jeans" <== love that!! What great similies... that's pretty much how I am every day!! lol

    Never something shameful.. and only to be studied if it brings insight.. as you always do with your writes!!

    Fantastic!


  • sheltered
    October 11

    Edit | Reply
    Daydreaming in school again? Shame on you.
    I trust you did all your math homework though.
    knowledge + a lot of luck = success


  • account disabled
    October 11

    Edit | Reply

    are you sure
    unclear behind was not meant to be a nuclear behind?

    hanging from a paper crane
    I read it that way

    curiosity
    masked into shame or not
    makes intelligence
    and there's always a need for satisfaction
    behind all morals (or fears)


    • notorious
      October 11
      Edit | Reply
      Nuclear has an ass?
      AWESOME!
      I love that I learn so many logically nonsensical things from you...

      You are freaking amusing.

      • account disabled
        October 11
        Edit | Reply
        well yeah
        and I think it's copyrighted
        it's called einstein

        p.s. but I think the expression smart ass got born in Renaissance


  • narcissist
    October 11

    Edit | Reply
    I want those chocolate coated mint oreos.. thanks a lot.

    I really love this. I knew I would. I love the first stanza.. I get images of a pile of them made out of boredom and the wish for something pretty to distract. I don't comment as well as you, I more know I like something and feel what it makes me feel, without being able to explain the 'why's.

    also, I had a science teacher like that.. two actually. I don't think they ever enjoy their job.


    • notorious
      October 11
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks!!!

      As for the food cravings, a lot of my deeper conversations center around food...haha.

      At the risk of causing you to like this poem less (this is the baldness of honesty)...this poem is based on dream I had. Ergo, the usage of 'dream' in this poem, which was quite literal, LoL. My science teacher (and ceramics teacher ) is actually like my favorite teacher and nothing like how he was in the dream/poem.

      I think I just played down any significance in this poem.
      LMAO.
      But I don't want to leave people with deep meanings when there might not even be one...LoL.

      But...there's always a commenter's interpretation, and you're an awesome commenter. Not monosyllabic at all.

      • narcissist
        October 11
        Edit | Reply
        haha not at all. still love it. I know a lot of inspiration gets exaggerated in poetry.. I have a poem about that actually, but I think I might have deleted it a long time ago. literal or otherwise, it's very well done.

        going to have to end the commenting merry-go-round (i looked up tiovivo! ) because it's 5am and I'm dead tired. I'll be back for more : ) have a good night/day


        • notorious
          October 11

          Edit | Reply
          All righty then... Afraid I was gonna lose integrity...LMAO!

          But...dreams are like exaggerations of real life, kind of, I think...which is why weird shit like that happens and I'm compelled to write about it because I'm so sure it's not based on reality...well, sometimes, anywho.

          Deleted it?!!!
          I want to read it now.

          Oh coolio--'tiovivo' is a neato word for sure...talk to you soon

  • Cannonsfire gold member
    October 11

    Edit | Reply

    Because she whined freely....

    No chocolate glazed donuts but a liberal helping of humility because in this poem you are surrendering to the overt teachings of a pompous overwrought science teacher who'd rather be set on fire by his own bunson burner than teach kids lol I know this as one of mine used to say it on a regular basis!


  • Rainbowgasm
    October 11

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my gosh.
    I'm left completely speechless.
    I have so many favorite parts in this.
    Bookmarking fo sho.
    Good luck in the contest and I hope you win ♥


    -Rainbow.

  • JohnnyD gold member
    October 11

    Edit | Reply
    To origami a thousand paper cranes is quite the undertaking? And dusty theories of how they wish nature to be construed and constructed blow about as such cranes in a gentle breeze, like the psuedo-science of global warming, a political gambit meant to instill fear for the purposes of obtaining grants and the vasts amounts of money to be made by certain folks in stoking said fears of youth that their life will be destroyed by a fable.

    fact is the world is one giant living organism, and knows how to accommodate for natural swings in temperature shifts FAR better then human's will even be able to contemplate a thousand years from now.

    the newest, most powerful weather computers, with several terra-bytes of computing power-loaded with garbage in-garbage out programs- are SOOOO efficient at forecasting disasters-but-not one of them, not one can accurately forecast what has happened in the "past" weather wise.

    and now the newest-well not so new scam- our children are getting brain cancer from cell phone radiation!!!

    and we ask congress to fund millions of dollars in research to save them before the earth has no humans!

    Of course the amount of natural radiation which goes through us from solar sources, cosmic rays and a myriad of other sources far outweighs cell phone emf radiation,
    perhaps we should fund research in how to eliminate nature???? Yeah, that is what we should do-eliminate nature for you see "Its nature" that makes us die huh?
    we could have the ACLU sue God for not giving us an eternal lifespan so we can accomplish even more stupid things?? Personally I think he should make it so any political humans had a lifespan of -oh two hours and twenty minutes-including bathroom breaks.

    now THAT would solve 98% of ALL our problems!

    Wonder if I can copywriter that idea?? hmmnnn???

    and as for our presidential elections here in the states, I'd rather vote for a rabid Malamute than either of the moronic candidates we have running.



    Len

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