so many pills i choke from the load
a normal life i never will know
i await death to relieve of the strain
uncomfortable life again and again
having to live each day within this
it is too much; i am the abyss
the incredible task of just being me
no longer part of society
my life to me now, it seems but a joke
those wishes and dreams i no longer invoke
i have no more hopes
i have no more will
each day slowly passes
i long for the kill
. . . or is it the pill
the one that will work the one that is good
the one that helps me to live life as i should
all this misfortune is certainly mine
i chose it myself; i live it in time
a normal life i never have known
i was just born to suffer alone
. . . to live all alone
all alone on my own
all alone each day plays
each day that goes by
for my sins i must pay
my sins or my choices
they equal the same
same consequences
different name
i look in my hand
i can't stand them still
i gobble them down
each pill, lovely pill
why did i choose life to be this way
i want to go now i want an away
why do i stay i ask though i know
because of my choices i've no place to go
a normal life i never will know.
copyrightŠ slcorey
Author notes
category #4 -- addiction
Written March 23rd, 2004
A contest entry
- Drug Addiction by isa.
300 points, ended April 13, 2004, 35 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
-
holy crap....i really really liked your entry to my contest. Im not exactly sure what pills you are talking about here, but whatever they are, i know, its hard not to. thank you for sharing your very perosnal words here. keep up this great writing, good luck in the contest!
-Isa -
nice job
the one that will work the one that is good
the one that helps me to live life as i should
all this misfortune is certainly mine
i chose it myself; i live it in time
this is definately my fav part of this poem, the emotions in this are intense it's crazy this is very well written great job ~RAVEN~
-
Thats really so melancholic....yet it is so beautiful as so deep....it really has lots of meaning behind it...I can say that I can so relate to this...my life havent been normal anymore from a long time...especialy from the time I got stuck in this addiction...anyway nevermind...
I really loved the wording and imagery as the flow that you did put in this beautiful piece...especialy in those lines:
"so many pills i choke from the load
a normal life i never will know
i await death to relieve of the strain
uncomfortable life again and again
having to live each day within this
it is too much; i am the abyss
the incredible task of just being me
no longer part of society
my life to me now, it seems but a joke
those wishes and dreams i no longer invoke"
Wael -
Definitely a melancholy piece that conveys many struggles in life and the loss of hope. I know this feeling all too well, but came to the conclusion that I can either lose all hope or choose to rise up and try again and believe in more, to restore my faith and to reach out for those willing to help.
This is well-expressed raw emotion. Thanks for sharing
~Kathy -
There Is Hope...
This was very deep in melancholy emotions. I can totally understand what you're saying in this piece. To want to die, is one of life's most serious problems. The best solution is to get help. I went through six years of depression and an anxiety problem before I finally got help, and now I'm on anti-deppresants, which I know has mixed reviews about it (young people turning towards suicide because of the meds), but for me it had a very positive effect, and my life has totally turned itself around. It's never a shame to get some help. You'd be surprised just how good your life can feel. It's as though, before, I was Abby #1 (the dead girl), now as Abby #2 (I'm able to live, I yearn for the future, and I've got goals such as going into web design, and I'm a published poet). I no longer wish to kill myself, and on the ocassion when I do, it's merely passing through, it doesn't dwell, I've learned to move and see beyond the black cloud and the end... 
-
thank you for your comments and for taking the time to read my writing. very encouraging and appreciated -- facelessness
-
a very sad poem, but beautifully written and I certainly know how it feels. A great write and best of wishes...~genielassie~
Adding your comment:
1 - 7 of 7
